Amboseli National Park (Kenya)

...a long weekend in the Amboseli Game Reserve as a thank you for helping him out at such short notice (his usual travelling companion was ill and sadly couldn't go).

Nairobi is very high up and I started suffering from altitude sickness within a day or so of arriving there (it's about the same height as Jo'burg, around 6000ft asl). We got the exhibition out of the way (easy peasy), and then we hired a minibus and driver to take us to ...
...THEN we were told why Amboseli is not *such* a popular game park - the Masai who live in the park had killed off all of the big cats to protect their cattle. No big cats then..... We looked forward to another day of elephants...........

The food at the Hotel was superb, as if they had imported the best French chefs to come and cook for us. Fabulous roasts of local beasties including zebra, impala, gazelle and ostrich, that's me sorted..... ... more

It was one hell of a shock ! My boss rang me up and said "What are you doing for the next couple of weeks ?"

I said "Not a lot. Where are we going then boss ?" - it was my wedding anniversary the first weekend, and I was going to see Pavarotti the second weekend, but nothing I couldn't just drop instantly (Yeah, like I'm gonna miss my wedding anniversary and miss seeing Fat Bloke sing !)

He told me to go to Newport the following day and get my passport sorted, and get jabs at the docs asap. Then he dropped the bombshell :

2 weeks in Kenya ! Cool !!!

So, what's the deal then ? The deal was, we were going to show our company's wares at the "Britain In Kenya" exhibition in Nairobi, and then make some business calls throughout the rest of the country (including Mombassa). The whole trip was scheduled for two weeks. I thought it was going to be a punishing routine, flying from Heathrow business class, staying in one of Nairobi's few five star hotels, doing an exhibition for three days, then going to Mombassa, but I felt that I was up to the challenge.

On the flight, he sprung the extra surprise : he had planned a long weekend in the Amboseli Game Reserve as a thank you for helping him out at such short notice (his usual travelling companion was ill and sadly couldn't go).

Nairobi is very high up and I started suffering from altitude sickness within a day or so of arriving there (it's about the same height as Jo'burg, around 6000ft asl). We got the exhibition out of the way (easy peasy), and then we hired a minibus and driver to take us to Amboseli and be our guide for the long weekend. His name was Charles and his English was fortunately excellent, as opposed to his driving, which was abyssmal !

I arrived at the Game Park feeling even sicker than when I had started out, but the complementary champers and fresh fruit made me feel a little bit more human. It was quite a culture shock. I mean, Nairobi had been a *bit* of a shock, but as I had already been to several large cities in the Middle East, it was not *so* much of a surprise. But the Game Park was just out of this world.

Gekkos on my hut walls, making that funny little noise that gives them their name. Other little lizards and huge spiders, scampering over the rocks next to the path to my hut, and, more than anything else, those unbelievably cheeky monkeys, that were SO bold, the Hotel was employing "monkey scarers" to try and prevent them from annoying the guests ! And that was just in the Hotel area.

The usual touristy crowds were there, you know the types I'm on about - the ones who get up at 4am to put their towels on the recliners ? Yeah, that's them..... Plus a few Brits and Americans, some of whom we teamed up with to go on one of the daily safaris. Charles had offered to take us out, just in the minibus, but we didn't feel that would be authentic enough (and that was the truth, it wasn't even that his driving was so bad !), so we plumped for the bigger bus with the rhino bars on the windows and no air conditioning.

Sure, we saw elephants, then we found some more elephants, including a baby or two, which was cute, but it was JUST elephants, for the whole of the first day ! Jeeeez, enough with the elephants already !

When we returned to the Hotel, we asked if there was any chance of seeing anything *other* than elephants...... Not much, we were told. Maybe a giraffe or two, and maybe some warthogs and water buffalo, if we were lucky, but big cats ? What about the big cats ??

THEN we were told why Amboseli is not *such* a popular game park - the Masai who live in the park had killed off all of the big cats to protect their cattle. No big cats then..... We looked forward to another day of elephants...........

The food at the Hotel was superb, as if they had imported the best French chefs to come and cook for us. Fabulous roasts of local beasties including zebra, impala, gazelle and ostrich, that's me sorted..... and the memory of those meats lives with me even now. Superb !

The second day was actually more productive, as we had a different driver who knew what was where, and we did manage to see our share of giraffes, wart hogs, zebras, water buffaloes, impalas and a few other creatures, which nearly (but not quite) made up for the absence of the lions.

We were also invited to one of the Masai villages, by Charles, our original guide who knew the Headman there. We took this visit in on our way out of the park, on the road back to Nairobi. I was prepared for a bit of a let down, considering what we had seen so far, but it turned out to be the highlight of the entire trip !

These were real Masai, living in real cow dung huts, living their own real lives in the middle of this huge real game reserve. Admittedly, they put on a bit of a show for us, but we were made to feel genuinely welcome, and we were invited to eat with them in one of their huts. God only knows what we were eating, but I felt it churlish to refuse. It wasn't so bad, a sort of meat (??) and veg stew with a mush of maize in it.... I hoped they ate this well every day, as i had been only too aware of the poverty in Nairobi.

The children did their ABCs and 123's as a show piece. That felt a little fake, as they obviously had learned it all by rote, but at least they were enthusiastic, and certainly not shy and retiring. Plenty of photo opportunities there then ....

Then the Masai women came and sang for us. They started of with several well know Western Christian hymns, as they are all Christians there. When they had done, I asked, through Charles, if there was any chance of them singing some of their own music. I told them that I was a musician and was very interested in the African rhythms I had heard in the streets of Nairobi a day or so earlier.

They sang. A song of some considerable rhythmic quality and variation, the beat of which, not even my percussionist skills could not fully follow ! I was gobsmacked.... this was it, this was the real thrill for me :-)

I slowly picked up a few phrases, and started to join in on the choruses, but, as I sing counter-tenor in my local choir (very high voice for a man, up around Kate Bush level !), the women just burst out laughing and called me "Mwimbaji" which, as far as Charles could tell us, means something like "Castrati" (look it up !).

Forget the bloody elephants, this was Africa !

Cost : free, paid for by my company.
Value for money : dont make me laugh :-) YES !!
Go again ? : If I could afford it, yes.
Rating : Only given "average" - based on overall feel. If I rated it on the Masai village experience alone it would have been five stars, but the lack of big cats was a real let down. A bit like the curates egg, good in parts.
Shopping & nightlife : non existant in the park, so irrelevant really.
Scenery is a semi desert / semi jungle, what did you expect ? :-) 

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