Canberra (Australia)

...and Washington DC. Hands down, Canberra is the least capital-like Capital city I have ever seen.

Canberra is in its own little world, the Australian Capital Territory, much like Washington's home in the District of Columbia. Rumour has it that when they realised they could do with a capital, the good people of Australia were torn between the two obvious choices, Sydney and Melbourne, and decided to give it to neither, lumping it instead ...
...Lake George we arrived into Canberra late morning.

My first impression was that I had finally found a competitor for Milton Keynes for the 'Sterile, pre-planned city of the year' award. The city was truly bizarre. The lawns were beautifully manicured, the streets were clean and deserted, the buildings looked immaculate. The whole place had the air of a film set - nothing with history, nothing lived in, nothing real - crossed with Wisteria ... more

I like to go all out when I travel, and since I've made it all the way to Australia (and, incredibly, managed to get someone else to pay for it all under the pretence that it's a business trip) I'm keen to take advantage of my temporary location and see it all, or as much as my time frame will allow. This weekend, therefore, I decided to pop off to Canberra, Australia's capital, to see what all the fuss was about. I've visited many capital cities, from Vienna and Rome to London and Washington DC. Hands down, Canberra is the least capital-like Capital city I have ever seen.

Canberra is in its own little world, the Australian Capital Territory, much like Washington's home in the District of Columbia. Rumour has it that when they realised they could do with a capital, the good people of Australia were torn between the two obvious choices, Sydney and Melbourne, and decided to give it to neither, lumping it instead in the middle of a vast wasteland somewhere roughly between the two. It's about a 3 hour drive from Sydney, and though public transport is on offer in the form of busses and trains, many choose, as we did, to take an organised tour. These have several advantages, which will become clear during your read.

So there we were, one fine Sunday morning, waiting outside a hotel we had falsely told the tour operator we were staying at in order to get a free pick up. This saved us having to navigate our way to Star City (the other side of Sydney from where we are) and gives you advantage number one: when it's early on a Sunday and you're two bus rides away from the departure point for the majority of Sydney coaches, going on an organised tour saves you a lot of hassle.

We were soon on our way, enjoying an enlightening, educational and entertaining commentary (advantage #2) which included some very un-PC comments about life in multi-cultural Australia, and some anecdotes that feature the French in starring comedic roles. Excellent. The trip is a long one, so we stopped off for morning tea in a little country village en route (advantage #3), something you cannot do on a standard bus or train. Passing the Southern Highlands and Goulburn sheep district (not really an advantage unless you're that way inclined) and driving by Lake George we arrived into Canberra late morning.

My first impression was that I had finally found a competitor for Milton Keynes for the 'Sterile, pre-planned city of the year' award. The city was truly bizarre. The lawns were beautifully manicured, the streets were clean and deserted, the buildings looked immaculate. The whole place had the air of a film set - nothing with history, nothing lived in, nothing real - crossed with Wisteria Lane or Stepford - a spooky atmosphere where things were perfect in every way, yet too still and quiet, as if you were feeling the calm before the storm. Bill Bryson hated Canberra. He said in his book 'Down Under' that it was sterile and lacking in both personality and people. At this point I was beginning to think he was right.

Things got better as we drove towards the National Museum. As we approached we were treated to magnificent views of the city and surrounds. We took a scheduled lunch stop in the café there, and grabbed a few minutes in the gift shop before our guided tour began. The museum displays a hodge-podge of things that all relate somehow to the vague title of 'National Museum of Australia'. There are art and crafts including work by the indigenous people, displays celebrating the history and community of the country and, my favourite, the Eternity exhibit. This features the personal stories of 50 ordinary and extraordinary Australians, separated by feeling and experience - from thrill to joy, fear to hope, chance to mystery, devotion to passion.
The museum is, I suppose, the equivalent of the British Museum, but reminded me of the latter in no way. The building is super modern inside and out, and the architecture is, as a result, verging on the bizarre. The place was very quiet, despite it being early afternoon on a weekend, and it felt strange because of this - though it catered to young ones, with a few hands on things, some artificial tree houses and story telling activities, there were no hyped up children hopping from foot to foot, or tearing around, or chattering excitedly. It was a very strange place, and yet perfectly represented the bits of Canberra we'd seen, and soon would see.

INFO: General admission to the museum is free, though there is a charge for guided tours (advantage #4…this is included in the tour price). Website: www.nma.gov.au/

Our next stop, a short drive away was Parliament House (the newer one as they have two) for another guided tour. This showed us another problem of Canberra - though not large, it is spread out enough for you to need to drive between places. Therefore, having a coach at your disposal for the day is greatly beneficial (advantage #5). The tour took an hour, as the previous one had, and came complete with a guide who really knew his stuff, and who was happy to share this knowledge (advantage #6). We saw the Queen's terrace and the House of Representatives and Senate Chambers, along with some amazing art work that adorns the walls. It is such an unknown place to me, unlike the UK equivalent which pops up on BBC2 far too often and which I sometimes think I know better than some rooms in my own house, that it was interesting to go inside and be able to see where everyone sits and stands and talks, surrounded by the lime green and crushed strawberry seats (green and pink they most certainly are not).

INFO: General admission and tours are free of charge, though there is a fee for some audio tours. Website: www.aph.gov.au/

Next, we moved on to the Australian War Memorial which was not really of interest to me before I got there, though proved surprisingly intriguing once we got inside (advantage #7…I'd never have gone if I'd been there on my own). As well as the usual reflection pools and eternity flames and tombs of unknown soldiers, this memorial also had a number of exhibits and galleries, including features on aircraft, the Second World War and Post 1945 Conflicts. The shop was also an experience given the time of year we went (mid November) as their Armistice day stuff was still out, and it was here we discovered that they have found a way to make anything poppy-patterned, from mouse mats to pot holders to hand bags.

INFO: Free entry though they ask for 'gold coin donations', i.e. $1 / $2 pieces (UK 40p - 80p). Website: www.awm.gov.au

In addition to these three visits, we drove through the centre of the city, past the many embassies that line the streets and up to the summit of Mount Ainslie for spectacular views over the city and a glimpse of the only 'normal', commercialisation in the place - a little ice cream van / souvenir shop at the top.

We left Canberra early evening and aside from a brief dinner spot, spent the next few hours trekking back to Sydney, keeping an eye out for squashed kangaroos and wombats on the road. It was a rushed, busy, non-stop day, but I enjoyed it, and was glad we'd decided to make the effort to visit.

Canberra is described as being Australia's most modern capital city and the political and administrative heart of the country. Yet if anything the city seemed to lack a heart, a soul, a substance. I believe about 50% of the residents are government employees, but it's the stuff that is required to support that that seemed out of place there - the nurseries and schools for their children to attend, the supermarkets for them to buy food in, the hospitals to treat them when sick, housing for the people providing the essential support services like cleaning and rubbish collection. It wasn't bursting with life or energy or noise, and everything happened in a restrained, polite manner - it seemed the kind of place where children would walk neatly in single file, where trees would grow in proportion at all times, and always in the correct direction, where clouds would could in precise patterns, always white and cool, never stormy, and where dogs would never dream of pooping on the street. In other words, it felt very surreal, and like something from a strange sci-fi film. That said, it was definitely worth a visit, if only so I can marvel forever more at the bizarreness that is this city.

Doing a tour cost us $104 (=45 GBP) and since it was a long, full day (7.30am until 9.30pm) that felt very much like we got our money's worth. It is possible to do it as a self-drive or similar, and to stay over night, but we saw the main sights, got interesting commentaries and took some good photos. Accommodation ranges from top of the range hotels for visiting dignitaries to youth hostels for visiting dudes and dudesses. See www.canberratourism.com.au/ for more information, or google 'Canberra day tours' followed by the city you're leaving from (e.g. Sydney or Melbourne) for a selection of tour operators running trips to the area.

 

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