Corfu (Greece) > Reviews > FROLICS ON CORFU

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I'm not sure if I'll be able to keep this op on the subject of the island of Corfu, mainly because of the goings on in our holiday accommodation, but I'll try. If you've picked this up from my account list of opinions, then I apologise for having turned it into a mini "Wish You Were Here", but I'm having really excellent fun in digging out the photo albums to rekindle some of the memories.

We spent two weeks on a Mark Warner holiday at the Club Barbati. My husband had a habit of winning the work competitions where the prizes were holidays, so the operators had already been chosen for us, otherwise I'm not sure I'd have booked with them. Not because I think there's anything wrong with them, but they are watersports specialists and I'm one of the world's greatest armchair spectators. Still, we weren't tied to the club, we were free to do whatever we wished, so we left others to fry on pontoons, waiting for 2 hours before you get a quick waterski, and headed off around the island.

Ipsos was the nearest actual resort to Barbati, and was a few miles down the dusty road. We had to walk there in order to hire our car, (hereafter known as the Magical Shitheap) which we'd swiftly decided was vital, because if they caught you hanging round the complex they were hassling you to do aerobics, or sailing, or watersking, or windsurfing, or whatever other form of water torture they could devise. Ipsos was obviously THE place to be at night. Every other building was a bar or club, and it was full to busting all over. Definitely good for a laugh, but not a lot for conversation. Still. Who needs to communicate more than "Get them in!" During the day, it was a busy little beach resort with loads of manic motorcyclists careering along the roads, and the water had manic jetskiers, so we headed off elsewhere to get away from all the mania.

Paleokastritsa (my Greek isn't brilliant, so bear with any spelling errors) was our saviour, and we'd keep going back there just to take in the magnificent scenery. From up on high, you look down over the bay and the jutting promontories into the sparkling blue sea. This is best done from the popular restaurant, whose large balconies afford a really great view. On the largest promontory, there is a wonderful monastory, and we visited it more than once. The monks are in residence, and as I recall, you are asked not to speak to them. The trotted about occasionally, and tended to garden work, and look very charming in their outfits. I don't mean any disrespect, but they reminded me of Uncle Bulgaria from the Wombles, only in a long black dress.

Corfu Town is busy, busy, busy, and a nightmare in the Magical Shitheap. Apparently it was just a massive free-for-all, no need to understand the traffic laws as no one takes any notice of them anyway. We didn't find too much to enthrall us there, but we did find a cricket pitch with a concrete batting strip in the middle of a large square. I was quite scared for any drivers who were trying to negotiate the town and dodge the flying cricket balls at the same time. Loads of nice looking buildings, but I didn't fancy getting out for a stroll so off we dawdled through the jams instead.

Cassiopi was a charming small fishing village just to the north of Barbati, full of traditional and brightly coloured boats and crafts. We had a nice look round here, and ate some excellent food in the waterside restaurant too.

We took a boat out for a couple of days too. You can hire these for a set number of hours, and just go off to get to the beaches that you can't reach by any other means. Most of these were stones, but they were deserted and surrounded by dramatic cliffs. Absolute heaven.

We'd seen some pictures of something called Mouse Island, where the was a minute old church on a little island that was attached to the mainland by a walkway. We managed to find it, and it was indeed charming, but the trouble was it to be found at the end of the airport runway, which ruined the atmosphere somewhat. The photos look great, but that's because you can't hear what was going on in the background. Also near here is the small island, who's name escapes me, but it was there in the house, on a kitchen table, I believe, that Prince Philip was born.

We also visited a large and beautiful house which my memory is calling The Achillien Palace, but I'm not utterly convinced of that. It was set in gorgeous gardens, with loads of statues to Achilles, but the house wasn't open during the day. At night it was a different matter as it was operating as a Casino, but we never visited it then.

Dassia was another beach resort close to Barbati, but it was much more upmarket and very quiet, and for some reason we didn't like it enough to go back for another visit.

We did visit Benitses, but only for a brief time. A brief, brief, brief, time. We parked up by a splendid looking roman harbour wall remains, took one breath, and swiftly got back in again. The smell was appalling. I don't know whether this was commonplace or what, but it was overpoweringly sulphurous, and we got out of there as fast as we could.

The Magical Shitheap got us almost through to the end of the holidays. It packed up at the furthest point away from Barbati that it could, the guy came out to replace it with another car - a Fiat Panda. My husband is 6ft 3" and had to drive it back to Club Barbati with his head through the sunroof. What a laugh!

There, I did manage to say something about Corfu, and never once mentioned the Nymphomaniac guest who caused sexual mayhem for the last week of the holiday; Nor about the middleaged couple who spent the entire week sitting in plastic foldaway chairs in the car park - and her in white acrylic cardigans in 90 degrees of heat; Nor the misunderstood husband who went round propositioning any woman he could find when his wife had gone to bed.

Corfu? More like Cor-phew!