Ingoldmells (England)

...to home and Skegness and Ingoldmells seemed to be the easiest to get to so that was where we pointed the car. As it was a weekday the roads weren't too busy and it took approximately one and a half hours to reach our destination. As small person had had me up on the hour every hour during the night in anticipation of our BIG DAY OUT he fortunately fell asleep about ten miles down the road and didn't wake up until we were on the outskirts of Ingoldmells ...
...those who don't already know Ingoldmells is on the East Coast of England in Lincolnshire.

Ingoldmells and Skegness are practically joined at the hip but we settled on the former, thinking it was not quite so commercialised and would be quieter. Big mistake.

In recent years an amusement park, Fantasy Island, has sprung up alarmingly. There used to be a small amusement park but it's certainly grown in the last few years ... more

As it is now officially summer, schoolchildren on holiday and plenty of reviews on exotic places to be had on Ciao I thought I would write one on the less than exotic Ingoldmells.

I've exhausted the supply of places of interest close to home and small person loves the seaside, as do all children I think, so yesterday we packed our buckets and spades and headed off to the beach.

Unfortunately none close to home and Skegness and Ingoldmells seemed to be the easiest to get to so that was where we pointed the car. As it was a weekday the roads weren't too busy and it took approximately one and a half hours to reach our destination. As small person had had me up on the hour every hour during the night in anticipation of our BIG DAY OUT he fortunately fell asleep about ten miles down the road and didn't wake up until we were on the outskirts of Ingoldmells so that was a bonus. No, "are we nearly there yets", to contend with.

For those who don't already know Ingoldmells is on the East Coast of England in Lincolnshire.

Ingoldmells and Skegness are practically joined at the hip but we settled on the former, thinking it was not quite so commercialised and would be quieter. Big mistake.

In recent years an amusement park, Fantasy Island, has sprung up alarmingly. There used to be a small amusement park but it's certainly grown in the last few years and houses all manner of weird and wonderful rides plus an indoor centre should the weather cause you to want to stay inside where there are yet more rides, numerous arcade games and cafes.

The first car park we spotted was situated next to Fantasy Island and the market, which boasts itself to be one of the biggest in the country, but I have my doubts about that.

Parking all around Fantasy Island seemed to be a standard £3 per day with no concession made for the disabled but there were plenty of spaces to be had. I noticed on the way out that if we had been prepared to walk a little further one enterprising resident of the town had transformed his garden into a car park and was charging a mere £1.50 per day.

The market which we walked through to get out of the car park has a vast array of stalls, mostly sporting fake designer gear, dodgy dvds and unsurprisingly toys and towels seemed quite popular too.

There are numerous cafes dotted about both the market and the exterior of Fantasy Island and a couple of licenced bars if you need calming after some of the hair raising rides.

Luckily our small person didn't come up to the measurement indicated by a ruler outside some of the hairier rides so we got spared that at least.

Showing what a long time it is since I visited a funfair or the like, I was amazed at how expensive the rides were. Although you paid in tokens for most of them, obtained at kiosks situated around the place, most of the kiddie rides seemed to be about £1.50. You could pay in euros too if you happened to have any and there was a rate of 3 euros = a £1.50 ride, bit of a rip off there me thinks.

First stop was face painting which we weren't allowed to walk past and this cost £4. I was pretty gobsmacked at this exhorbitant charge considering they do it free at our local Brewsters when you pay £1.50 entry per child, £1 of which you get back towards food or a drink.

Anyway with spiderman clutching my hand we headed out of the funfair towards the beach, a couple of minutes walk away. Before you actually hit the beach there are a few more shops selling the usual seaside sundries such as buckets and spaces and the like, a "designer" sunglasses stall, all costing £4.99 a pair, so there's no excuse not to look trendy when you hit the beach, and a couple more cafes. Then, practically on the seafront is another takeaway place selling hot and cold drinks, snacks, icecreams etc.

The sands looked clean and sparsely populated when we got there and the sea an uninviting dull grey.

There are notices warning you to be vigilant as there are no lifeguards patrolling the beach and to make sure children are adequately supervised.

With no further adieu shoes and socks were ripped off and off we went to, in my case dip my toe in and in small person's to throw himself in fully clad. Back to base to remove soaked clothing and hang it on the railings leaving hubby in charge of the soggy mess while we frolicked in the sea. OK, a small lie there. Small person frolicked and I geriatically hobbled about taking care the waves didn't come above my ankles. It was mightily cold in my opinion, but it didn't seem to affect small person. He didn't turn blue but the face painting merged into a pleasing black and red blob. The sun was shining and the beach seemed to fill up pretty rapidly. By the time we walked back to hubby he had managed to find yet more new best friends and within ten minutes we knew their life history and also that they had blown £1800 of back family tax credit on a trip to Ingoldmells. I'm not sure what family tax credit is, but they were on their last couple of hundred pounds on the third day there.

I cannot begin to imagine how much it would cost for a family to holiday here for a week. Frightening thought really.

We were beginning to get hemmed in on all sides now as people came by their dozen and erected wind breaks and tent things around us. As we managed to get the only day this year that was calm and sunny I couldn't see the need but each to their own.

I got the short straw and walked back to the infamous market to buy a change of clothes for small person. Anyone with half a brain would have anticipated the need for spares and brought them with them but of course, I didn't.

By now hot and tired (we got the one good day this year and it was really warm) we decided refreshments were in order and off hubby went to the seafront cafe for food and drink.

I don't know if you know but fish and chips out of the paper and an icecream are compulsory when visiting the seaside but this was not to be the case here. The cafe only sold chips and burgers. The chips were not "real" just some frozen version which don't resemble a proper chip in any way and smelled of grease, not in the least tempting, so the small person insisted on a portion and big people declined. I did taste one for research purposes and can advise that they are thoroughly unappetising and not recommended at all.

Now on a mission to find proper fish and chips we headed back to the carpark to go further afield in our quest. Not before we had to stop at a couple more rides. A not too horrendous water splash thing for £3 for hubby and small person and a further £4.99 if we wanted a picture to commemorate the occasion, or £3.99 for a keyring with a smaller picture of the joyous pair in.

Just when we thought we'd escape we came across a junior bungee jump thing where junior is put in a harness and bounces up and down on a trampoline and held by a giant elastic band. This was another essential, so £4 and a couple of minutes later we were finally on our way. I must just say that despite it's cost this bungy thing provided a great deal of pleasure. Our 5 year old, like most at that age, has no fear and in no time was peforming death defying back and front flips with me looking on in horror and anticipating a broken neck or limbs at the very least.

Another rip off price, but highly enjoyed all the same.

As we headed out of the, by now, heaving resort, we didn't pass anything which bore any resemblence to a proper fish and chip shop, much to my disappointment, so we headed to somewhere else, Chapel St Leonards, also by the sea.

This was much calmer. Very few people about and we illegally parked at the side of what looked like the village green which was a large open area with a small play area for under 8s and a handy fish and chip shop across the road.

This time we struck lucky. Perfect fish and chips and although eaten on the grass and not the beach so we didn't get the pleasure of added sand they were just what we had been searching for. Small person settled for a fish as he'd already had the vile chips before so with the accompaniment of a fine cup of coffee each for the big people and a strawberry milk shake for small person all was well with the world. The sun beamed down, the food was excellent and no crowds, a perfect end to our visit to the seaside.

Just managed a quick nip to the equally uncrowded beach here so we could say we'd dipped our toes in here too and on our way home.

So Ingoldmells if you want adventure and fantasy and horrid chips and Chapel St Leonards if you want a more sedate outing.

A lovely day was had by all.

 

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