Munich (Germany)

'In Munich Stands a Hofbräuhaus'…or so, roughly translated, runs one well-known staple of Munich's beerhall sing-alongs. For many who've never visited this charming city (and perhaps, even for a few who have…) this, along with the even better-known Oktoberfest, an event which, to all intents and purposes, is little more than the Hofbräuhaus writ large, condensed into a month & transferred on to a circus ground, is pretty much all that Munich amounts ...
...I lived in Munich for about four years, in the late-seventies and early eighties. My earliest memories of the Hofbräuhaus involve sitting outside it in a parked Mercedes with my two brothers, when I was about six. Our father would drop in to have a beer, or two, with his German work colleagues, leaving us to wait squabbling in the back seat for an hour or so, occasionally bringing out pretzels, or a lemonade, to ease our thirst, if not our boredom. ... more

'In Munich Stands a Hofbräuhaus'…or so, roughly translated, runs one well-known staple of Munich's beerhall sing-alongs. For many who've never visited this charming city (and perhaps, even for a few who have…) this, along with the even better-known Oktoberfest, an event which, to all intents and purposes, is little more than the Hofbräuhaus writ large, condensed into a month & transferred on to a circus ground, is pretty much all that Munich amounts to. Well, it isn't.

MY MUNICH: I lived in Munich for about four years, in the late-seventies and early eighties. My earliest memories of the Hofbräuhaus involve sitting outside it in a parked Mercedes with my two brothers, when I was about six. Our father would drop in to have a beer, or two, with his German work colleagues, leaving us to wait squabbling in the back seat for an hour or so, occasionally bringing out pretzels, or a lemonade, to ease our thirst, if not our boredom. It seems vaguely criminal now, and very possibly was, but we thought it quite thrilling at the time. We would watch a procession of ruddy-faced types in Tyrolian hats, and plump, blonde ladies in traditional dirndls disappear within the forbidding oak doors of its entrance, and ponder over the wonders we assumed lay within. When, a few years later, I was finally able to experience it for myself, it was with a great deal of disappointment. Actually, it was little more than a rather untidy composite of the tourist postcards I'd seen displayed on the Marienplatz... Yes, the waitresses really do carry umpteen massive Bier-Steins at once, but they do so in a depressingly desultory, rather joyless fashion, as though unwilling to draw attention to their prowess. The cheery sing-songs I'd once overheard as muffled intimations of raw, Bavarian joy were more clumsy and drunken than anything else, and most of the assembled throng weren't singing along anyway, probably because they were Japanese and didn't know the words. There wasn't a Tyrolian hat in sight. The outside beer-garden is pretty enough on a summer's afternoon, but otherwise unremarkable. The really wonderful thing is however, that none of this actually matters…because Munich's true beauty lies elsewhere altogether.

HISTORY: In the tenth century AD, a fraternity of monks settled the area where Munich stands today, naming their settlement 'Munichen', deriving from the German word for monk. Clearly enterprising types, they capitalised on their position at the banks of the River Isar, a vital trade route at the time, by levying a fee on everyone who crossed their bridge. This exercise proved lucrative, but the proverbial spanner was thrown when Henry the Lion, duke of Saxony and Bavaria, established a new settlement nearby in 1158. He subsequently burnt down the Bishop's bridge and constructed one of his own to replace it, forcing a monopoly. Today, Henry is generally regarded as Munich's true founder, although the town's emblem still features a robed, Augustinian Monk, perhaps in homage to its original inhabitants. The cities rule was ultimately assumed by the royal Wittelsbach clan, a well-connected family with slightly embarrassing cultural pretensions, who held sway for over 400 years. The clan's final true head, the 'mad' and foppish King Ludwig II, perhaps best known for his various follies, drowned in suspicious circumstances in the Starnbergersee in 1886, aged just 41, but is still credited with commissioning some of Germany's most lavish and beautiful palaces. He also continued the cultural revolution begun by his ancestor, the first Ludwig, which had lead to Munich's becoming known, in the early 19th century, as an 'Athens on the Isar'. More recently, Munich is known for its regrettable association with the National-Socialist movement, and Hitler's failed 'Bier-Putsch' took place here in 1923. The city also hosted the ill-fated summer Olympics of 1972, which were marred by the actions of certain middle-eastern terrorists. Today, however, Munich is a vibrant, progressive, and cosmopolitan city, with one of Europe's best universities, and many of its finest artistic and architectural treasures. Bavarians are intensely proud of their heritage, proclaiming Bavaria a 'Free-State' at every opportunity, and frequently identifying themselves as Bavarians first, Germans second.

THE OLD CITY CENTRE: Munich's skyline is dominated by the twin-towered, onion-topped, Frauenkirche, and this Cathedral's predominance seems assured, thanks to recent state legislation that regulates & restricts the height of all surrounding buildings. The Frauenkirche is a beautifully conceived structure, boasting a Gothic nave that dates back to the 15th Century. Next door, is the famous 'Marienplatz', Munich's main square, and home to many of its most important festivals and events, such as the gobsmackingly lovely 'Christkindlmarkt', held every year in December, which is one of Europe's oldest, dating back over 600 years. Set in a prominent position in front of the Marienplatz is the Neues Rathaus, or New Town Hall, built in1867. This is an almost luridly ornate structure, festooned with cascading flowers throughout the spring and summer. The entire façade of the building, furthermore, is smothered in an array of minutely detailed gargoyles, and the building also features one of Munich' best-loved landmarks, the Glockenspiel. This is a revolving-clock whose small dancing figures twirl prettily on the strike of the hour, every hour, to the tune of countless little bells, re-enacting a knight's tournament to celebrate the marriage of Duke Wilhelm V, in the early 16th Century. A number of street-parades are held in Munich every year, and typical participants include hairy-footed draughthorses lugging massive barrels of Loewenbrau, seemingly-endless brass bands, jugglers in Medieval attire, fat and mustachioed town councillors in leather knickerbockers, and countless children in traditional costume. Most of these parades culminate in a fabulous assembly at the Marienplatz. This may be beginning to sound a little too kitsch, or too romantic, as though it were all the product of some tourism board's feverish imagination, but it isn't. The people of Munich, as elsewhere in this part of the world, really do seem to live their own history, it feels relevant, and somehow, honouring their traditions in this way doesn't seem in any way foolish.

SHOPPING: Extending out from the Marienplatz in all directions is Munich's city centre, which hosts a fabulous assortment of specialty shops, boutiques, department stores and restaurants, as well as the ubiquitous bakeries and beer-halls. There are also a large number of antique dealers and antiquarian booksellers, as well as several excellent flea markets, mostly held on weekends. The 'Antikpalast', a little further afield near the Ostbahnhof, is Germany's largest Antique emporium, with hundreds of dealers and innumerable stalls. Munich, although having a reputation as an expensive city, is actually full of shopping bargains, especially when it comes to antiques. I bought a charming, late 17th Century fob watch from a little shop behind the Marienplatz a few years ago for 200DM, and it was subsequently valued at well-over £1,000. Being the careless poseur that I was in my twenties, I took to carrying it around with me, in place of my usual, battered old swatch, until one day I was foolish enough to stash it in the back pocket of my jeans, and then to sit on it. Perhaps I'd still get that 200DM back, or rather, its Euro equivalent, on Ebay.de, but it's certainly not a foregone conclusion…
Anyway, moving swiftly along, there are also a number of first-rate enclosed and open-air food markets in the city. The Viktualienmarkt, Munich's oldest and largest open-air market, is little short of a Foodie-Paradise, with no less than 22,000 square metres of cheese, fresh fruit, seafood, and countless local beers and sausages to sample, as well as flowers and handcrafts. A couple of other exceptional markets include the Dallmayr & the Elisabethmarkt, named after an Austrian Empress. Much levity surrounds the Elisabethmarkt's so-called 'Milch-huette', or 'Milk Hut', originally founded to provide an alternative to alcoholic beverages, and to keep public drunkenness in check, but since converted into a rather rowdy beer-garden…

ATTRACTIONS: Rowdy beer gardens aside, one of Munich's greatest attractions is the Englischer Garten, a wonderfully extensive, all-round open space near the cities centre. This was the first public garden to be established in Europe, founded by Bavaria's unpopular ruler, Count Karl Theodor, in a rather overt attempt to placate his public and avert a revolution on the scale of that in France. The Gardens extend along the River Isar over several kilometres, and incorporate a number of huge lawns, a decorative Japanese Tea-House, several lakes, and quite a few Beer gardens, one of which is located in the well-known Chinesischer Turm, an ersatz Chinese-Pagoda with literally thousands of seats spread out around it in the summer. In winter, skating is popular on the garden's frozen lakes, and in summer, nudist sunbathing is rife…and legal. It's probably worth mentioning that not every German resembles Claudia Schiffer, and a lot of the male physiques on display are more reminiscent of Boris Yeltsin than Boris Becker…
Whilst Munich boasts a number of impressive museums and galleries, it would be impossible to do justice to them all in a review as brief as this one. The Pinakothek Art Gallery is divided into three parts; Old, New & Modern, and the old part holds one of the most important collections in the world, with more than 800 masterpieces. The Deutsches Museum, which is largely technical, is a must-see for anyone interested in human ingenuity in its various forms, and contrives to contain an example of pretty much every moving-object ever invented. It is a massive endeavour; original military planes dangle from the ceilings, cars and buses are lined up, as though ready to depart, and interactive displays are in abundant supply. There is also a very memorable re-construction of a pre-historic cave, complete with original cave-paintings. Other gems include the Egyptian museum, at Hofgarten, which has a very creditable collection of Egyptian Art, and the frankly stunning Glyptothek, located near the Konigsplatz, which houses a spectacular array of Roman & Grecian sculptures, many of which were cynically 'souvenired' by Ludwig I during his various foreign jaunts. Finally, there's the toy museum, at the Marienplatz.

The BMW museum, located beneath a distinctive, futuristic tower, is another popular tourist destination. Apparently it's very interesting, containing an example of practically every form the BMW brand has ever taken, be it on two, three or four wheels, as well as planes and other modes of transport. I can recall many a dreary Saturday afternoon spent here, listlessly wandering around amidst the exhibits, feigning interest when my father attempted to explain some fiendishly ingenious little piece of German engineering, impatiently awaiting an ice-cream from the stall near the exit… My brothers however, had a ball here, and enough people since have raved about the new, interactive exhibits that I feel compelled to mention it.

Schloss Nymphenburg, located about 8km north of the city centre, was the summer residence for many of Bavaria's rulers. Building started in the 1600's and it took over 150 years to complete. The palace's exterior is quite restrained and discrete, belying the almost vulgarly extravagant set of reception rooms inside. Suffice to say, stucco, rococo & frescoes abound. It is an extraordinary building, however, and well worth a visit.

SURROUNDINGS: The Alps are actually visible from Munich's towers, especially on clear days, and in winter, the city is obviously very handy for the slopes. Garmisch is the nearest German ski resort, about 100km south, but there are far better options across the border in Austria, which are equally accessible. In summer, King Ludwig's
Castle at Neuschwannstein is a practically un-missable day-trip, if you can spare the time.

GETTING AROUND: The best means of exploring Munich can be summed up in two words: Public Transport. Munich's train-network, which is separated into U-Bahns & S-Bahns, is clean, efficient and very reasonably priced. Taxi's, as elsewhere in Germany, are also very reliable.

WHERE TO STAY: Like most cities of this size, Munich has a comprehensive array of accommodation on offer. The huge and grand Bayerischer Hof, founded in 1841, is located in the centre of the city, and is arguably one of the loveliest hotels in the world. Doubles start from 240 Euro, but rise fairly exponentially thereafter. At the other end of the scale, the Euro hostel, just spitting distance from Munich's main train station, has won numerous accolades both for its numerous freebies and facilities, as well as its location in a beautifully restored, listed building. Private doubles start from 25Euro. Further afield, the historic Schlosshotel Grünwald, is located not far from where I used to live, in a delightful, almost woodland setting overlooking the River Isar. It is only 25 mins from the city centre on the S7 train. I've stayed at this hotel before, and can't recommend it highly enough; it is also exceptionally good value for a hotel of this standard. Doubles start from 130Euro, and include a sumptuous Bavarian Breakfast. As a matter of interest, this is also the hotel where the children from the original version of 'Charlie And The Chocolate Factory' stayed during filming in the early seventies.

WHEN TO GO: Munich is actually beautiful all year round, but I would advise against visiting in July-August, when it is overrun with tourists, mostly Japanese and American, or during the Oktoberfest, when it is seething with young Australians, who are ferried across from London by the coach-load, presumably to get drunk in a new & different location. May or September would probably be the best months to visit, other than December, of course, for the Christmas market.

FINALLY: People may tell you that the Victorians invented childhood, and perhaps they did, but I've never encountered a race so devoted to the notion as the Bavarians. The earliest examples of German mechanics, as displayed in museums, are frequently little toys, whether tweeting tin birds or painstakingly detailed little marching soldiers, and this seems to be no co-incidence. I remember a conversation I had, a few years ago, with a Bavarian publisher, discussing the co-edition of English children's books. She told me that most of the bestsellers for English-speaking toddlers would never make it onto the shelves in Bavaria, as they were too earnest, too self-consciously educational, too focused on early-learning. Children, she told me, ought to be children. Learning facts is for later. Germans are frequently assumed to excel at the latter, but their devotion to the former is less well known. In any case, when I was a child, Bavaria generally, and Munich more particularly, seemed the most exciting and magical places on earth. Our weekend playground was the countryside beyond, which resembled a scene from the Sound of Music. We fished in the rivers, and swam in the lakes, until they froze, that is, when we skated on them. We gorged on cakes, hid in forests, and indulged in all of the colourful little local festivals, some religious, others pagan, but all presenting useful pretexts for treats and for dressing-up.

I remember my mother crying, on the day we left Munich for good, and at the time I marvelled at her silliness. After all, we were going home, back to Australia, and more importantly, we were going to stop off at Disneyland on the way! What could there possibly be to cry about! Well, the castle at Disneyland, as I discovered, was simply a disappointing, concrete replica of Ludwig's at Neuschwanstein anyway, and whilst we could still run about in the grass in Australia, it was never without a certain, enduring terror of snakes.

I've been back to Munich a few times since I lived there, and loved it. There's more than enough to entrance any twenty-something, with its Oktoberfest, its markets, its clubs and bars, especially those near the University, and no shortage of things to keep visitors of any other age very happily occupied indeed, especially children. And although 'my' Munich will probably always be the one I experienced as a child, I'm always happy to go back and discover it anew, and always glad to find Munich just the same, if not even better.
 

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