Not quite a silver surfer yet.
Interested in technology and gadgets. Have been a photographer, tec...
Not quite a silver surfer yet.
Interested in technology and gadgets. Have been a photographer, technician, computer analyst. Enjoy a good SF novel or movie, Australian wine.
Dislike rip off companies.
Member since:26.06.2006
Reviews:21
Members who trust:3
All events and characters in this review are based mainly on real events but also some other stuff.
As this is 'The Orlando Experience' I feel justified in telling my story from 1999 - some current price info is included - but readers might want to check latest prices using t'internet.
Any resemblance to other events and characters whether real or imaginary are purely coincidental.
All review details are taken from current sources.
The identities of characters must remain secret to protect the innocent - i.e. me.
This one's an epic....
So, end of a contract, time to have a relaxing break and maybe treat my old mum.
Being energetic and athletic I immediately dash to the sofa to find the remote control to begin the search for a suitable place (before I had t'internet). Mum turned up with her dog Fluffy - a straight haired mixed breed, not well named - and started to quiz me.
'Oh teletext holidays - are you going somewhere son' - sharp like - all the family are. 'Yes mum - I thought you might like to come along' 'Where are we going?' 'Orlando' 'Who's Orlando' 'Oh bless....................', a bit of explanation and she is delighted. 'I'll invite my sister'. 'Yeah but no, but yeah but no, but yeah ....'
I must have ended on a yeah cos next thing we know my old aunty is packing her bags and is insisting on paying her own air fare. That's OK by me. I have to kind of break it to her slowly that she will need to unpack cos it aint even booked yet.
In the end I booked a flydrive holiday for late October staying at motel style apartments about 2 miles east of International Drive. I can't actually remember the name of the place but as you will find out later, it's best that way - reasonable place but ......!!
The weather in late October and early November is usually as warm as the hottest summer day in the UK - but there can sometimes be cold spells and small amounts of snow is not unheard of.
********************** Finding a holiday on teletext is reasonably easy. However, what you see isn't ever what you get. e.g. I found a holiday including car hire and accommodation for "From £233.00 per person"
Strange how it ended up at around £650.00 per person. Now if they had said exactly what the cost was up front I think I might have looked for a cheaper hol - so that is perhaps why they advertise their holidays with low 'From' prices.
Anyway be aware of the extras you might have to pay before giving your credit card details. The 14 night holiday described to me ended up as a 13 night holiday when the tickets arrived - I managed to get the holiday company to refund some money ,but it was like pulling teeth.
Places you can find holidays in Orlando ... Easiest these days is the internet - you can get complete packages online. For those who aren't up with 21st century technology there's still your highstreet travel agent where I'm assured (mainly by high street travel agents) there are bargains to be had. Teletext of course - not something I would use again. **********************
Sadly my aunt booked her flights on the same days, from the same airports, but on different planes - I thought I was the dim one. Family eh, what would you do without them. In situations like this I always imagine what it would be like to be without family or friends and it all pales ino insignificance. It's always a rainy day without you ........
We can smuggle her into the apartment when we arrive so we won't have to pay extra - seemed like a good idea at the time ...
Manchester Airport: ********************** Located south of Manchester off the M56 (or it used to be, they keep changing roads down there), the airport is your typical international jobbie where you can fly to most destinations. When I went, I chose to use the actual onsite carpark - when I say onsite , it's a short shuttle bus ride from the terminals -the shuttles run every few minutes and are free. As you drive in you pick up a ticket from a machine and for heavens sake, you must put it somewhere safe IMMEDIATELY - lose it or leave it in the car and you are in for a stressful time on your return.
Cost me around £75.00 for two weeks.
Strangely there are places advertising on the internet now which say prices from 93p per day for parking - but these tend to be several miles out - you pays your money and takes your choice. **********************
We arrive at around 07:00, for our flight (me and mum) at about 9:30, pull into the car park, collect the ticket and locate a space - good job I had some fuel left, flipping huge car park with bus stops every 100 yards or so.
Mr T (that's me by the way Tim nice but Dim) goes into action straight away and lobs the ticket into the glove compartment, which I discover later is a big mistake.
The usual check in procedure and a wait of some 2 hours - they say to turn up with at least 2 hours to spare for long haul flights - bet it's so you are tempted to buy stuff in the shops - they still have duty free for long haul.
Flight and tips: Our plane, a wide bodied jet of unknown type, is pretty empty so we head off to Glasgow to pick up a load of drunken youths. Still if aunties plane is going direct
to Florida, this should reduce the wait for us at the other end .......
I know it would not be allowed these days but these five or six young men got on carrying a couple of crates of lager and beer - and they were flirty with the stewardess to the point of being abusive - time to move seats I think.
The pilot of the plane must have just been given the keys by his dad - he drove it like a sports car with lots of heavy acceleration and breaking. So, I hear you ask, how do you break sharply in flight. God knows, but he could do it - we got thrown forward against your seatbelts several times.
********************** During the flight - drink plenty of water and avoid any alcohol. This is especially true for the older traveller. Stretch you legs frequently if possible by walking around the cabin - best not to do this all at the same time though. These days you can get special pressure stockings to help prevent DVT - back then it was a still little known problem.
The declaration: When I went in 1999 you had to fill in an entry declaration form each:- nationality, name, address, phone numbers, purpose of visit and loads of other stuff - worryingly, the steward told us you have to be very careful filling them in or in some instances you can be refused admission - at the very least you'll be forced to the back of the queue at customs to fill it in again. **********************
Arrival at Sanford International, 30 miles North of Orlando City: (about 4 hours till aunty arrives)
The pilot landed his sports car/jet and I managed to prise my fingernails out of the plastic arm rest -mum's hair looked much whiter than when we set off. On the way out towards customs there was a wheelchair waiting as she had requested, but being mum she ignored it completely and walked straight past. I asked later why and she just said 'oh that, do you think they were upset' - probably would have slapped you if you had made yourself known to them.
Car rentals and driving in the US: So we need to find the Alamo - car rental that is, not the old fort in Texas. We follow the signs and there's a queue would you believe - we are bringin up the rear as usual. At the desk at last : 'Yes sir, do you have a booking?' - good job I did have one cos it looked like there were only two cars left - a flashy convertible Mustang beastie and a Chrysler neon. Having booked the neon, I expected just to receive the keys and set off. Unfortunately then came the hard sell where the guy, he was backed up now by all the other staff who had no one else to torment, tried to make me take the Mustang.
'Surely sir would like a more comfortable, bigger car, only $80 per day extra'
'Of course not, I'm English , I'm not paying an extra £700 to have my hair messed up by the wind' - after about 30 minutes of saying no, I' want the one I booked they relented and gave me the keys. Stick to your original booking, don't let them badger you. **********************
There were 3 rental companies in 1999, Avis, Alamo and one other I can't remember. {Wow ,there now appear to be 17 - see http://www.carhiresearch.co.uk/cars/United-States/Sanford-Florida-Airport.html}
You can just turn up and rent one over the counter, but this is not recommended as they might not have any left, best to go for the fly drive option from your travel agent. Your car should have a full tank of 'Gas' as the yanks call it - check if it is petrol or diesel as you requested and don't forget - your insurance doesn't cover stupidity - filling up with the wrong fuel will cost you dearly. Give the car a good look over before you get in to make sure it appears OK - anything dodgy and refuse it, you should have a safe, roadworthy vehicle. **********************
Checked the car, it's an automatic (most are in the US), looks easy enough ,might as well locate the hotel now, we've got 4 hours at least before aunty turns up. I ask a guy who looks like a tour guide which is the road to Orlando. He gives me a free roadmap with all the attractions on it and draws a squiggly line to indicate the way. Great, smashing, ta very much. Must remember, these guys drive on the wrong side of the road also sit on the wrong side of the car while driving.
Three minutes down the first road on the map and there is a toll booth - which is just visible in the dusk. Oops! - need to turn the lights on. Costs 50cents. Another three minutes and another toll booth appears - there's a pattern emerging - quick brained Rob is not to be outsmarted!!! . There must have been five or six before we got to a turn off which looked like one marked on the map.
It's dark now and instantly I turn off the toll road, I'm lost - the road signs are confusing me and the constant nervous talk from mum is annoying at best. Put on a brave face so as not to upset mum. 'Er mum, I'm lost ........' Me afraid of the dark - in this place you bet! :
Here we are unfamiliar with the place and lost in what appears to be a safari park without any animals - no signs of any buidings, or people or traffic. Time to park up and study the map. As soon as I stop, mum opens her door and makes to get out for a cigarette. Shouldn't need to point out how crazy that was - in the end she is convinced by the sheer look of terror/tiredness on my face and the doors and windows remain locked.
Nothing for it but to press on and find somebody to ask The bad guys: (a scene from Miami Vice) Great found some signs of life, I pull into what looks like a hotel/motel car park - tell mum to stay in the car and lock the doors -and warily approach a guy with two women on his arms. Instant sphincter clencher as the guy, who is now only five feet away, turns around. We are talking the most evil looking Hispanic geezer you ever saw - nearest thing I ever saw was on Miami Vice. The two girls glance at me but don't make eye contact - must try and do the same despite their obvious, barely clad charms. So it's me doing all the talking and trying not to let the escaping gas cause a squeak (wouldn't be a good time to fart). Fear takes over, this guy has just stood and stared contemptuously at me for what seems like hours, but was in fact only about 10 seconds, I thank him for his time and help and leg it back to the car.
Mum suggests phoning the hotel for directions - knew she was there for a reason!
The hotel: As it turns out this is about 100 yards from where we spoke to the really nice Hispanic gent. Just enough time to sign in and make our way back to Sanford to pick up aunty.
The cops: Nice guys , very helpful if a little suspicious of us. Not keen on going back via the toll booths, I decide to ask some cops at a roadside diner for directions to the I4 which, I had seen from the map, passes within 5 miles of the airport. 'Excuse me officer'. Instant sphincter clencher as the guy, who is now only five feet away, turns around and reaches for his gun. At least one of my muscles is going to get well exercised on this trip.
The cop indicated, with obvious amusement, the road next to the diner and pointed at a sign about 50 feet away - a nice little red topped blue shield with I4 on it. Oh! Humm - So the easy way to the airport takes around 25 minutes - speed limit on most of the I4 (outside Orlando City) is 75mph. Absolutely no toll booths.
Arrival at Sanford International again, picked up aunty who had miraculously just emerged from the airport as we drove up and made for a diner to get some food - I've now been awake for around 24 hours so avoid having any alcohol. Back down the I4 - fantastic, some great views of Downtown Orlando at night and the modern skyline, turn off into the International Drive area and bish bash bosh - lost again.
I am not keen on phoning the hotel again - embarassment factor 9 - so we hail a taxi and pay him $5.00 to lead us to he hotel, what a nice man, very helpful and friendly so we get his firm's number for later - no need to check in - smuggle aunty into the apartment - It is now around 26 hours since we set off from home -I get well deserved kip under an noisy air con unit - slept like a log, woke up in the fireplace around 08:00 same day.
Day one what shall we do: ********************** The obvious first place to check out would be Disney World. Once you know how to get to the I4, just head south to the 192, hang a right (getting the lingo now) and a couple of miles West, you find the Disney Main Gate West.
Sadly, I didn't ever go - mum and aunty weren't too interested - but I have it on good authority (my big bruvver) that it is absolutely wonderful - he should know, he's been many times. Check it out on the web - there are loads of websites devoted to it. **********************
A day by the pool for the oldies - exploration in the motor for me: Before the holiday gets into full gentle stroll (as opposed to swing) I decide to have a day exploring in the car to familiarise myself with daytime driving and, check out various locations I've seen on the map. Mum and aunty lounge around the hotel pool recovering from the travelling - well they are both 65+ and it's difficult concentrating with both nattering in the car.
Universal Studios: http://www.universalorlando.com/ turn your volume down for this website ....... ********************** Location Near International Drive - just follow the signs Parking: was $15.00 in 1999 apparently this has increased dramatically of late Entry prices : you could get a day pass for about $50 each or a multi day pass which works out cheaper if you are going to visit regularly during your stay - If you have kids, you'll need the multi day pass - they will want to go back again and again. Here again the prices will prabably be higher today. Lots of rides and many new ones since 1999 , see the website
Twister - OK but not up to the standard of some rides.
Back to the Future - brilliant classic but a bit of a rough ride at times.
Cat in The Hat - (no really I was forced to endure this)
Terminator 3D - Arnie appears in film only and interacts with stunt men/actors on stage - all done with you wearing 3D glasses
Speedboats - there is a boating lake in the centre where stunt speedboats regularly give shows - really good.
Sea World and Shamu: http://www.seaworld.com/sw_index.aspx ********************** Location: Near the Southern end of International Drive - just follow the signs - there's a big hint when you get near, the street is called 'Sea World Drive'
Parking : Fairly typical , now probably cost a packet - check the website for latest prices. Entry prices: was about $40 each in 1999 - seems to be nearer $100 now Penguins, Manatee, dolphins all great stuff. Shamu - still the star of the show - has one or two displays per day - arrive early at the enclosure to get a good seat out of the sun.
Arctic adventure ride: Really strange and a bit surreal, there is a small cinema room with seats on a moveable platform with
Pictures of Orlando
Gator Land
barriers around - as I recall the seat belts were pretty heavy duty - why seatbelts in a cinema? I won't spoil it for you but don't go on a full stomach.Kennedy Space Centre ********************** Location: Head East from Orlando and just follow the signs - toll roads unfortunately but not very many booths.
On the way I checked out Cocoa Beach - It was a bit manky and looked like a good lick of paint was needed eveywhere. The beach was dirty, but is apparently a great place to watch launches from the Space Centre.
Parking: free - be careful driving around the base - some military and some large NASA traffic. Entry prices: Adults around $40
No launches when I went but still a really great place with lots of static rockets, a guided bus tour - 3D cinema experience and souvenir shops.
Epcot centre: http://www.planetbr.com/mapaep1e.html ********************** Location: Lake Buena Vista , West of the I4 Parking: as is the norm now , more expensive than you would hope - see the internet for lates prices. Entry prices: Single day passes are available - or multi park, multi day passes. It was about $35 when I went but I can't find anywhere on the web which gives the one day ticket price - the multi day tickets are from £135 per person - Wow
The park consist of a lake around which there are pavilions representing most part of the world where you can sample that regions food and drink as well as buy region specific souvenirs - So you go to Florida and buy a Canadian fur seal pup model, made out of real Canadian fur seal pup and imported from Taiwan. Errrr!!!
It's actually OK if you ignore the souvenirs, some pavilions were giving away free beer when I went - guess which ones I wanted to see.
There is a section called Future World near the entrance and the big golf ball thingy.
Honey I shrunk the kids and Dino adventure were two rides I tried out - both great fun - but I won't spoil it for you. there are many other attractions - please check the web.
Gator Land - http://www.gatorland.com/ and gator nuggets with fries: ********************** Location: South on Orange Blossom Trail , heading towards Kissimme Gator Land is on the left. Parking: free Entry prices: $17.00 for adults
I think their alligators must have feathers and cluck a lot :-) You can buy gator nuggets and fries, but since the gator is a protected species, I think it is probably chicken. Quite a nice relaxing change to the hustle and bustle - some gator wrestling displays and gator feeding time. Very interesting to see how big these guys get as I am about to meet them at Bob's Airboats.
Bob's Air boats and Medieval Times themed restaurant ********************** Location both off the 192 Parking: free in both cases - a car park at the Medieval Times, a grass/gravel verge at Bob's Entry prices: http://www.adventuresinflorida.net/MedievalTimes.htm (I've had a look and it now seems to be about $34 to $50 - there seem to be two conflicting prices on the website) Good entertainment but I'm not sure it is particularly Orlando oriented - you can go to one of these in the UK.
As for Bob's Airboats, you walk up to this little wooden hut and ask the sleepy guy if you can rent a boat - mum and aunty weren't up for the airboat so we went for an elecrtic powered dingy sort of thing. Cost me about $15.00 for an hour. You get about 30 seconds instruction on the outboard egg whisk - forward is this switch, backward is this one. OK got it. Here we go into gator infested swamps - most of which seem a bit bigger than the dingy - hope they've fed recently.
Brilliant scenery and so quiet - just a very slight hum from the electric motor. We all really enjoyed the little boat trip and were quite impressed by the diversity of wildlife we saw. Come in number one yout time is up - now there's a phrase that can cause panic if you know what is in store. Happily we were blissfully unaware of the incident about to take place. There is the narrow spot we squeezed through to get into the main waterway - the boat is barely making any headway against the flow - within arms reach and I ask aunty to reach out and try and pull us through - wishfull thinking. So back off and let mum drive (silly but needs must). With me in front we manage to get tied up to the branches near the bank - no way to get to the bank - no chance of getting the boat through the gap. I'm requested to jump in and pull us through (dim but not certifiable), I refuse. We're all going to die expression on mum and aunty's faces and yes, more excercise for my sphincter muscles.
I locate a whistle cleverly hidden so it will be hard to find and let rip - bloody..... hell..... - alligators , cranes and all manner of critters scatter. Some annoyed local turns up and fastens a rope to the boat - he's got the powerboat from Miami Vice and looks like somone from the movie Deliverance but not Burt Reynolds or John Voigt (better practice the sphincter exercises again) - Well the end bit of the ride was hair raising to say the least. I can recommend Bob's Airboats purely on the adrenaline rush you get from thinking you are about to snuff it but the scenery and wildlife were fantastic.
Restaurants and bars: ********************** Barnies traditional diner- for some American food: These little diners are all over the place - reasonable food - with grits if you want - American fare - good prices - recommended for a quick fuel stop.
The usual suspects Macdonalds, KFC but why would you bother unless you can't do without your daily fix.
The Red Lobster on International Drive- great quality food but quite limited - steak, lobster, surf and turf as you might expect from the name,but good prices .
Hooters: - now that looks like a nice place son ...... ! 'No Mum, I'll explain later'
Italian restaurant (nasty taxi man incident): I can't recall the name of the restaurant but it was on I Drive - the problem here was the rip off taxi driver - we had decided to not take the car so I could get wazzed. This is the same cab company as the previous nice chap who showed us to the hotel. All I can say is it takes all sorts. As soon as he realised it was our first visit - mum said hi this is our first visit - he started the run around, which I twigged fairly quickly - I had explored and knew pretty much where I Drive was from the hotel. We set off in the wrong direction and I pointed out that Universal Studios is near I Drive. 'So?' 'Well - isn't that the Universal Studios Spotlight over there about 5 miles behind us' 'Nope, there are dozens of those all over' - 'Strange, I can only see one' Now he was rumbled, the trip sort of changed direction towards the spotlight - Wow. So this is just a warning : don't let them know that you don't know your way around and tell your mum to keep it zipped.
Charley's Steak House: - best darned beef in the USA (nope that's just the advertising outside) :- Charley's Steakhouse of Orlando, is one of the Top Ten Steak Houses in the United States, Charley's is famous for its high-quality meats at reasonable prices. The cooks at Charley's know how to grill a perfect steak. Included in the price of the steak is a potato (generous no!) and a trip to the soup and salad bar.
But honestly it were crap. We arrived in the free minibus, which was a good touch and entered the very dark restaurant - a bit too dark for me - and were escroted to our seats by a dead ringer for Freddy Mercury (absolutely no pun intended sorry). Immediately we were seated, Freddy produces a bottle of wine - wonder where that was stashed? He commences to open it. Not wanting to upset the guy, I said 'Oi ... Freddy No!!!! , have I ordered any wine'. 'No Sir, I thought ....' 'Just take it away please, if I want wine I can read the wine list thanks.' So we can expect him to spit in the food later. On a review note: the wine list was quite extensive but the prices were uber expensive - starting at $65.00 and going up to unbelievable amounts. Sadly being a bit of a wine drinker, I had spent some time in the wine hypermarket (oddly just up the road) checking out prices. Some of the wines on the list were recognised by me as being $2.99 types. Major rip off in progress.
The steaks available were brought round on a huge tray by Freddy - It reminded me of the Hitchikers Guide to The Galaxy - The Restaurant at the End of the Universe - each steak was pretty much a whole cow to my eyes. Still bleeding and I'm sure I saw one twitch. When I say these things were big, I mean gargantuan - the smallest was at least a 4 person Sunday roast. So not wanting to upset Freddy again (yeah!!) I sais 'Oi!!! Freddy, these for one person.' Oh shit I've upset him now. In the end, I order the smallest thing on the tray and mum and aunty have the absolute temerity to ask Freddy to cut a fillet steak in two for them. I think he was about to throw a wobbler, his face was a red as his silly waistcoat.
He toddled off and came back with the food - it were crap, but being English we just ploughed through it and said nowt. Now for desert. Freddy reappears with a tray covered in cakes and stuff - he must be strong cos this was huge as were the individual slices of cake on it. So not wanting to upset Freddy again (yeah!!) I sais 'Oi!!! Freddy, these for one person.' Oh shit I've upset him again. We decide to ask for the bill and leave without a piece of cake between us - it would literally have been too big for three of us- and I'm a bit of a food hog.
The food was relatively cheap - presumably they expect to make a killing with the unrequested wine - but as mentioned earlier, it were crap and they charged us $5.00 cutting fee, just to have the fillet steak cut in two pieces. AVOID.
Shopping ********************** Beltz factory outlet is at the top of I Drive where it joins Oakland Road - more shops than you can shake a wallet at, laid out in a star formation with each of the arms having its own boulevard of shops. Some food stalls and restaurants on site and a central seating area to just people watch.
Florida Mall is just off South Orange Blossom Trail - a couple of miles from Orlando International Airport: All I can say is take some comfortable walking shoes, the car park is enormous and the shops are numerous. More expensive than you would hope, but these are some of the top shops.
International Drive: souvenirs : what more can I say, If you want a tee shirt or a novelty candle or key ring, look no futher. Some nice lifesyle shops though for glassware and such.
Going home - tired but strangely rested at the same time: So is it any good:
Absolutely fantastic - go if you get the chance - but it is a long trip for older folk so if you have the dosh, I would recommend a stop over in NewYork before continuing to Florida.
NH Hotels, the hotel chain leader in Europe, with more than 300 hotels in 20 countries in Europe, Latin America and Africa. Enter into our web site and find the best available tariff at all times
exceptional by (6%):
very helpful by (56%):
helpful by (38%):
