The dave27 clan likes nothing more as a family unit than going out for dinner and have tried everything: English, American, Indian, Chinese, Italian, French, Bolivian(!). So, it's understandable then that at some point the subject of my lesson for the day should be eating out, and you've pulled the short straw, I'm afraid, for this very day dave27, Mrs D and the dave27-ettes happened upon a Pizza Hut for the first time in several Blue Moons and lived to tell the tale (barely).
We were on our way to a Craft Fair at the De Vere Hotel on the road to Blackpool, next door to Blackpool Zoo and just before the Victoria Hospital. There's a McDonalds out on that road, but over the way from there we'd spotted that a new KFC was being built. However, when we passed it by this morning, we were delighted to see that they'd also built a new Pizza Hut restaurant, which was now open, a couple of days before the KFC.
We agreed that after a hard hour's Craft Fair-ing, we would stop in for lunch rather than suffer the mortal combat of tangling with one of Mrs D's roast chicken dinners (a rare feat it is to tackle one of them single handed and end up victorious).
And duly, after I'd walked our abysmal dogs all round the grounds and Mrs D had managed to buy two crappy mosaic type pictures of witches for our holiday cottage in Brittany (nearly finished now, my dears), it was off to the Food Factory we went, with me and Mrs D proclaiming that we'd just have a drink and watch the dave27-ettes wolf their pizzas - you know how long that resolve lasted once we got in sight of the food, don't you? About thirty secs.
Our palates had been tempted immediately, as soon as we walked in the place, by the sight of an alluring salad bar, help yourself in style, though sadly not offering the 'as often as you like' trips perfected by Harvester. Oh well...
Lewis and Bethany settled for the regular salad (£2.50 each), plus the kids' Margherita pizza (plus sweetcorn in Lewis' case, moving the price up from Bethany's £2.79 to £3.08. Me and Mrs D with a fierce eye on our vast waistlines agreed to share a medium grand pan Margherita, boosted from the standard £5.99 made for 2 price to £8.69 by the addition of extra toppings of sweetcorn, ham and mushrooms. Given our slimline approach the fattest couple in England had taken, we ploughed on regardless with the lagers and pepsis. £4.50 for two bottles of ice cold Stella, £1.35 for Mrs D's pepsi refill and the dave27-ettes' refill drinks order included in their menu choice. What a bargain, £25.41 in total, a reet treat when your name is Ebenezer.
As for the food itself, and after all Pizza Hut is actually about scoffing up rather than coughing up, it was very, very nice, very filling, well cooked and fresh, leaving us quite literally too bloated to move, with the promise of an ice cream something which only gave us vague stomach pains while Lewis was making way for sweets in the toilet.
God knows how we'd have managed a Twisted Crust of Stuffed Crust variety, complete with seductive treats in the base. They only come with the large, big fat b***ard version of the pizzas, around £10.99, plus £1.20 for the crust. They say the medium pizzas serve 2 and the large ones serve up to 4 and I've always scoffed at that empty promise until now, but in this case they weren't kidding. Me and Mrs D barely struggled through to the delightful crusts of our delicate little repast before retiring with concussion.
The salad cart looked very inviting with just the sort of stuff we like, croutons, blue cheese sauce, croutons, beans, croutons, shredded carrot, croutons, bacon bits, more croutons, etc as well as the more customary tomatoes and healthy stuff like that. I guess a large salad at £4.50 would have been quite enough for a full dinner for me, and the bowl they give you for the regular salad size would quite easily accommodate a real plateful as long as you got the balance and placement exactly right - I guess that delightful pleasure is yet to come.
Service this happy little lunchtime was pretty good and there were plenty of waiters on, little delays in delivery and no glitches with the order. Our mouths watered at the sight of a large twisted crust monster, but we were desperate to run (or at least walk) away and live to fight another day, so we had to wave our white hankies in the general direction of the restaurant.
I know that it's early days yet for such a new building, but the toilets were nice and clean and pleasant as yet, and didn't have the customary smell of lazy men who absent mindedly chase the disinfectant block round the gutter while dreaming of their days as a nippy winger.
You can check out the company at www.pizzahut.co.uk but it's much more satisfying to nip along to your local tucker emporium and sample the wares on offer yourself. But be warned, just go prepared to loosen your belt and be laid low by food for the whole afternoon. I needed a quick waddle round the back just to feel slightly less swollen and behemoth-like after our trip. Mark my words, Pizza Hut will satisfy even the Fat B***ards amongst you...
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