Oh thankfully, a holiday, we decided to forgo the long drive abroad and stay in the UK. We trawled and trawled through the Internet looking for a bargain and gave up in favour of Bakers Dolphin. They cam up with a seven night stay with Pontins, we decided to ignore past reviews, worked out that the slightly higher price would offset any activities we'd have to pay for at another holiday park and book at the price of £367. Expensive? Well, the brochure was £699 for the Bank Holiday week.

So we get there at about 1pm but we cant book in until 4pm, however we get to use the facilities, so we spent a few hours having a drink and splashing about in the pool.
Booking in was not quite the horror others have described. They had 6 Bluecoats working, you handed over your booking letter and received an envelope with your key, directions and some vouchers. Where you got to go was luck of the draw. This is why we're not entirely sure we got the Classic apartment we paid for, or the cheaper Budget one, the only difference is the distance to the entertainment's. If we did end up in a Budget apartment then we paid £50 for our linen hire, but we are enquiring and will let you know what happens.

We unpacked and the thirst thing we did was head back to the swimming pool, which was a another building in need of a lick of paint. Nor was it as glossy or exciting as portrayed in the brochure. There was a big pool and a toddler pool, which was wonderfully warm, could have been all the kids peeing in it, I'm not sure! The big pool was quite large with 3 small slides and 2 very strict lifeguards. Ever day there was a sessions with loads of floatables chucked in! There were only 3 tiny changing cubicles and one of these had a torn curtain. Hence other females were getting treated to an impromptu show of buttocks, usually I charge for that on my webcam! The whole place was kept very warm and there were plenty of chairs , tables and sunloungers around. There is also a complete ban on cameras, video cameras and camera phones, safety reasons obviously although it made some people rather ratty.

Of course these take place in the bars of which there are three. The adults will be glad to hear of the Queen Vic, a real pub showing the footie which kids are banned from after 8.30pm. The Lunar bar seats 500 and is where they have the competitions, quizzes, karaoke, etc, its always packed and is always very clean.
The Fun Factory is the main venue, it holds a 1000 people and is where they have discos, bingo and the cabaret shows, its a good sound system ad always kept clean.
But this all sounds too perfect! They have nowhere near enough bar staff, 5 is the absolute maximum at any bar, with a wait of up to 15 minutes. The prices are extortionate! An alcopop will cost you £3.20, a pint at least £2.75, J20's £1.80 and a Double Malibu and Orange Juice a disgusting £5.10

Food and drink are, of course, important and of course there's plenty of it on the site.
The Sands restaurant was really quite good particularly the breakfasts, not too expensive either. Pity they didn't check the milk before a I took a big mouthful,
Mama Luigis provided us with a 14 inch pizza with loads of topping and cheese for approx. £9, it really did taste like a home made sauce and was quite good.
Caseys Whistlestop did excellent fried chicken and burgers, again reasonable prices.
Downtown Diner, more fried and hotdogs, well they looked nice anyway.
And the extortionate shop, well not really. I'm sure this had something to do with the fact that it also served the local community. It was no more expensive than my local Spar. It did have a large range of food and novelties, pity it began to run out of chocolate by Wednesday. It also did phone, gas and electricity top-ups.