Imagine, if you will, a bare white room. Add a Scandinavian-style double bed with crisp white linen, a tall white unit set at a jaunty angle in the middle of the floor, a glass desk which lights up and a white plastic stool. Odds on, the room you are imagining has a door. Shut it and paint it white so that there is no clue that there is a door there. Welcome to your bedroom at the St Martin's Lane hotel.
The St Martin's Lane hotel is more than a hotel, it's an experience. Part of the Morgans group of hotels it is known for its quirky nature which is aided and abetted by Phillipe Starck's rather unique designs
Situated in the heart of London, within spitting distance of the National Gallery, Leicester Square and Covent Garden, you could be forgiven for walking straight past the rather underwhelming entrance. The hotel exterior hides behind a 60s facade the gem that is inside. The presence of manicured shrubs and discrete doormen might just point you in the right direction and through the revolving doors but then again, like me, you might just walk straight past!
Then again, that's not a problem for most clientele. They will, of course, have been brought to the door by a chauffeur, who will fetch a bell boy, who will alert the receptionists, who will have you all checked in before you've even set foot on the pavement. This hotel comes at a price.
Reception service could not be faulted. Bookings were swiftly located and the needs of the guests ascertained. On subsequent visits to the desk one was greeted by name. Similarly, the concierge was superb. Simple tasks, such as the booking of cars and restaurant recommendations were met with enthusiastic responses which felt personalised. This hotel seems to know about service.
The reception area itself gives you a taste of what is to come. Large gold tooth shaped seats, gnome tables, chaise longs, oversized flowerpots and giant chess set the scene. Not forgetting of course the video doors immediately in front of you as you enter - it may be an aquarium scene or the night sky, depending on the mood - I wonder what lies behind. At night votive candles are placed throughout adding to the atmosphere.
Passage to the bedrooms, is, unsurprisingly, via lifts. These, though, are no ordinary lifts. Tiny video screens shoot pictures and sounds at you - eclectic would be one way of describing them. Then again, you might just think that they are downright odd. Art is what I guess we are meant to call them!
Nothing in the hotel is quite what you would expect from a "normal" hotel. The room numbers are situated in the carpet outside of the doors rather than on (or by) the doors themselves. On entering the rooms you are greeted with a huge sense of space. In a deluxe king sized room you'll find yourself in a hallway, opening to a closet and bathroom on one side and the bedroom straight ahead.
There's a bit of a thing going on with doors in this place. You'll recall the video doors downstairs? Well forget the over the top treatment here! The closet has voile curtains rather than doors, the bathroom has no door. The toilet and shower are, however, screened behind frosted glass. The door to the actual bedroom is left open and with good reason. It's a plain white, frameless door, which, when shut looks rather suspiciously like the wall - all a bit disconcerting in the middle of the night! It's like this with reason, however.
One of the selling points of the rooms is the mood lighting. In theory you can change the colour of the lighting in the rooms to suit your mood. In reality, there is a rotating filter, not dissimilar to early disco lights, which allows you to adjust the light just behind the bed. Rather than bathing your room in cool blue, mellow yellow, raging red or luxurious lilac you'll get a bit of a hue running down the wall behind the bed….
Whilst we're in the main bedroom, you may be astounded by the floor to ceiling plate glass windows. These are draped with voile also but how much fun is it to rip this back and be amazed at the drop below!
As with most hotels toiletries are provided in the bathroom. These are "AGUA" branded. For the uninitiated Agua is the name of the spa at the sister hotel, The Sanderson, just behind London's Oxford Street. It's an even stranger experience, but more on that another time.
This is a hotel where anything is possible but at a price. A KitKat from the mini bar? That'll be £4 Sir! A CD for the player in the jaunty white cabinet? That'll be £25. There is a Tesco metro just around the corner, use that! A call to room service for some drinks elicited a swift response, but then so it should have for the price. A call to housekeeping for some fresh towels was similarly met with a positive response. What's more, we had a choice as to when we wanted them delivered - we were off out, so it suited us to have them later in the evening.
There are various options for dining within the hotel. Room service is swift and portion sizes are good. The prices? You guessed, extortionate! Our room service breakfast came to over £50 for one cooked breakfast, cereal, French toast with a berry compote, tea and juices. It was very nicely presented, arrived on time, was set up in the room on a trolley table with crisp napery and so on, but was it worth that much?
Breakfast in the restaurant is better value. A full cold English and Continental buffet is available which is discretely restocked at every opportunity. A cooked menu is also on offer and ordering off-menu is permitted.
For meals at other times of the day your best bet by far is the Asia de Cuba restaurant. This is a renowned restaurant in London frequented by the "beautiful people". It produces Asian-Cuban fusion cooking in a way unrivalled by many. For lunch bento boxes are the order of the day (although a full menu is available). Afternoon tea is also taken with a twist of the East. Dinner though is really where this place comes into its own. Portion sizes are excellent, if anything they are too large. Prices are not as hefty as one might expect (having seen the KitKat for £4 in the room) but you won't get much change out of £100 for a basic meal for two with drinks. It's worth dining here just for the atmosphere, however. Bare bulbs hang from extra long wires above the tables, pillars are adorned with objects d'art ranging from books to mini-tv's showing arty pictures, to flower pots to… well… it's art! Dishes are designed for sharing, service is first class and presentation is to die for. The crispy calamari salad comes highly recommended to start. Leave room for dessert though - not only are the desserts fantastic, they are works of art in their own right! Justice to this restaurant can only be done in a full opinion, however!
For drinking you have two options (other than room service); the Rum bar and the Light Bar. The Rum bar is situated at the entrance to Asia de Cuba. A rather odd little area, it features tall brushed chrome tables designed by Starck taking a pop at the traditional English pub. The tables are tightly packed, about 10" square and there are no seats. Odd, slightly uncomfortable, but strangely appealing. Service is slick and individual with the bulk of drinks coming from a rotating cabinet.
The more comfortable alternative to the Rum bar is the Light Bar. This is hidden behind those video doors I mentioned earlier. When the bar opens in the evening, the doors are replaced by a charming hostess at a podium and a rather burly bouncer. The bar operates a "hotel guests and guest list" policy. On a Friday and Saturday night it is packed full of those "beautiful people" I mentioned previously. It is possible to get on the guest list, a discrete call to the hotel will usually suffice. It's also possible to get in if you are not on the list, however, unless you are a guest, be prepared to be looked up and down before you are granted entry. If your face, clothes and demeanour don't fit, you won't get in, list or no list. Whilst this type of discrimination doesn't appeal to me I think I can understand why they operate such a policy. There is a buzz about the place which shouts money and good times. The Light Bar is, primarily a cocktail bar. An average of £15 will buy you a beautifully presented cocktail selected from a long list. The waitresses serve you at your table and are happy to recommend. This is a place to people watch, to sip slowly, and to remember that there is a real world lying outside of the bar.
The name of the bar derives from an extension of the lighting theory on display in the hotel bedrooms. The only difference is it works in the bar. Areas are bathed in different coloured lights and huge back and white prints by Jean Baptiste Mondino adorn the tall modern-vaulted walls. Top DJs take to the decks on Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights - don't expect the party to get going until at least 11pm though!
So, what do I actually think?
My husband and I had an absolute blast when we spent two nights here. We had a ball to go to one night in Kensington and this hotel provided the perfect pre and post ball setting. Friends we invited round for pre-ball drinks were equally impressed.
There were a couple of negatives, tired carpets in the hallways and a rather poor gym by London hotel standards but nothing that could spoil the trip.
The service was first class and could not be faulted. The atmosphere was great in the restaurants and bars. It was perfect for people watching. It really was an experience that was most unlike anything we had done before. We're not into the clubbing scene and we certainly don't count ourselves amongst the "beautiful people" but that didn't seem to matter. This was all about having a good time in comfortable surroundings and to hell with the cost.
Regarding cost do I think it was worth it? Absolutely! I'd do it again which speaks for itself! I think that the room service items were a rip off but the price of the room, bars and restaurants were acceptable and not that far out of line with other London establishments. I'd pay for the atmosphere alone.
Rates from approx. £200 to £800 per room per night.
- 45 St. Martin's Lane London, England WC2N 4HX - Tel. 020 7300 5500 - Fax 020 7300 5501 Reservations - UK 0800 634 5500
