Firstly...lets be under no illusions...ITS FOR THE KIDS!
So if your planning a quiet holiday in the sun...NO NOISE..NO CROWDS... I suggest you look elsewhere!
(Unless your taking your holiday out of season when I feel the hotel and its surroundings will be a little less hectic.)
PINEDA and CALELLA. (THE RESORT)
The hotel is located in-between the two resorts.
Pineda to the North (about 10 minutes Walk)
Calella to the South (about 20 minutes walk)
Or if you wish the two resorts are served by a little road train which completes a circuit between the two towns.
About €2.30 for a return ticket or a round trip.
It boasts a 15 minute turn-around time.Sometimes there is only one train in service and a complete circuit can take over an hour!
The train leaves from right outside the hotel....if you miss the train..(OR ITS FULL!).. Judging the next arrival/departure is a bit of a lottery..!
Pineda is the smaller of the two resorts.
Entertainment wise (it’s a one street town) with several restaurants’ and bars and the usual array of trinket shops.
(Very pleasant but not a swinging nightspot!)
Calella is the livelier destination.
If its a busy resort you are looking for, I suggest you head north towards Santa Susanna, Malgrat and Blanes or a little further to Lloret. (NOT FAR!)
I’m afraid to say the beaches in Pineda and Calella are poor
A Builders Merchant Paradise.
Gritty Sand/aggregate!.....with a steep shelf into the sea.
Take a pair of sandals or flip flops because its impossible to walk (OUCH!)
The beach is easily reached by crossing the road and a subway underneath a railway track (COSTA BRAVA/BARCELONA line) about 5 minutes walk!
THE HOTEL.
I sometimes had the feeling that this hotel was searching for an identity!!
At times (In the quiet periods) you could be mistaken that you were in hotel designed to attract the more discerning customer.
UNTILL THE KIDS WAKE UP! Then all hell breaks loose!
As I said ..ITS FOR THE KIDS! So that is only to be expected.
The hotel is bustling throughout the day!
Facilities.
Two main swimming pool areas (NORTH AND SOUTH)
The Southern area tends to be the quieter as the north becomes the main family entertainment area during the day.
Both have kiddies paddling pools.
The pools are clean and well maintained.
They are each served by a Snack bar area selling ice creams, crisps, soft drinks alcohol and Tea/coffee etc .
Not Cheap! OWNED BY DICK TURPIN I THINK!
The Northern pool starts to shade over at about 16:00 to 17:00 ish which then attracts guests to the southern pool which is (half in the shade) until about mid day. Then sunny until the end of the day! (HIGH SEASON ESTIMATIONS)
There is also an indoor pool (SALT WATER I THINK) It certainly tasted like it when I received an unexpected mouth full!
Within the hotel grounds their is a small zoo...Goats, birds, rabbitts etc (Open from 15:00hrs to 17:00hrs only)
A ...9 hole crazy golf...very poor and they charge you over €2 to play. (DICK TURPIN ENTERPRISES!)
Lasts about 10 minutes!
A kiddies play park..slides..
swings climbing frame etc ,and a tennis court.
MEALS
Breakfast.
Served from about 07:45. To 10;45
Fresh Fruit, Salad, Cereals, Pancakes, boiled eggs or BOIL YOUR OWN EGGS! Fruit juice , tea coffee and the good old FULL ENGLISH which will probably give you a FULL ENGLISH HEART ATTACK! (IF EATEN EVERY DAY DURING THE HOLIDAY!)
Evening Meal
From about 18:30 to 21:45
Can be a bit of a FREE FOR ALL! during some periods!
The selection is vast!
Salads, Carvery, Soups. Themed Hotplate each night, (SPANISH-CHINESE, GALA, , ETC) + a kiddies hotplate...chicken nuggets etc!
Fesh fruit, sweets...puddings and deserts in abundance.
Drinks during the evening meal are purchased separately and there is a waiter service.(PAY ON EXIT)
As the Hotel became busier I think the quality of the food started to lapse, but as an overall judgement I would think that the standard is quite high.
Should you miss these timings, there is a separate Snack/Restaurant, serving food throughout the day.
Pizzas, Burgers, Chips, Ice Cream, Etc ....NOT CHEAP!. DICK TURPIN PRICES...
This is open from about 10:00 ish until the early hours of the morning.
AFTER THAT...the hotel has a number of vending machines which can offer a variety of ice creams, soft drinks, confectionary, crisps and even a machine which produces toasties and burgers etc....
But be warned, they are NOT CHEAP.
DICK TURPIN ENTERPRISES!
As an indication of cost for the hotel snack bars and vending machines......
A Mars Bar or a bag of crisps are about €1.30
Water, 500ml about €1.50
Soft Drink..Coke Fanta 330ml etc about €2.00. A large beer about €2.40
A Cocktail...almost €5.00!
At the time of this review a €1.00 was valued at about 90 pence!
Stock up from the little shop just outside the hotel...SIGNIFICANTLY CHEAPER....!
As a comparison...1 litre of water in the shop outside the hotel could be purchased for less than 50cents (or half a €)
KIDS CLUBS.
You guessed it...
They have enough to keep the kids entertained while you top up your suntan.
ALL AGES.. Tots to teenagers.....All activities!
Excellent Staff!
Hotel staff and Thomson reps provide the joint responsibility of entertaining the kids while you relax!!
Evening Entertainment
ITS FOR THE KIDS...!!!!
The main bar offers a varied selection of party games...competitions...guest performances of .......
COSTA DEL circuit acts MAGIC, TRIBUTE BANDS, and Karaoke.
It can be busy at times!! Careful not to trip over the pushchairs!
If you have ever experienced a Haven or Butlins Holiday you can expect pretty much the same!
Open to well past 01:00hrs in the morning!
THE KIDS LOVE IT!
Alternatively there is the Habanna Bar! (PIANO BAR)
This is an area where you are permitted to smoke! (IF YOU WISH)
Children must be accompanied by an adult.
The resident entertainment act,
(singing a selection of Roy Orbison and Elvis songs ), will probably commit you to slit your own wrists or jump off the balcony long before the smoke inhalation claims your life!
However...its never full and you get served a drink very quickly!
Open from the early evening to Death O'clocK in the morning!
STAFF.
Considering the circumstances they fair very well.
Most are polite, helpful, and very knowledgeable. (THIS INCLUDES WAITERS, DOMESTIC STAFF, RECEPTIONISTS, ENTERTAINMENT, BARSTAFF and ATTENDANTS)
However I would not blame them if every so often they were a bit grumpy....SOME OF THE GUESTS WERE RUDE ENOUGH TO MAKE THE ‘POPE KICK A HOLE IN A STAIN GLASS WINDOW!’
ACCOMMODATION
Basic and Clean
What more can you ask for!
Shower/Bath
TV
Hairdryers.
However.: There is no fridge!...Dick Turpin had them all removed... Very clever...
All chilled items are best kept in the vending machines anyway!
The hotel has about 850+ rooms and it is very noisy at night... Especially if you are located above the entertainment areas.
There are some rooms large enough for whole families and some set aside for singles. (some do not have a balcony.)
Twin rooms all have balconies and can be converted to accommodate 3 beds or two beds and a cot etc.
I travelled in a party of 4.
My wife , Daughter and 6 year old grand son occupied a Twin Room with three single beds.
I was allocated a single room with no balcony.
However the room was as larger than the twin room AND THE BED WAS A DOUBLE!!...(ALL TO MYSELF TEE HEE!)
As a final comment I was appalled by the behaviour of the teenagers/YOUNG PEOPLE! .. Chanting and swearing in the early hours of the morning. Both outside... and in the hotel corridors. The walls are thin and do not provide an adequate acoustic barrier to anything...even the next door neighbours snoring or other bedroom activities (IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!)!
ALSO...THE COCKEREL IN HOTEL ZOO SHOULD PLUCKED , GARNISHED, AND ROASTED FOR TEA !!!.
IT WOKE ME EVERY THE MORNING at about 07:00hrs! Along with the emptying of the bottle bank 06:00hrs, The pump that cleans the swimming pool at 05:00hrs and the noisy teenagers! 04:00hrs!
And finally, lets not forget the bed time frolics of Mr and Mrs %"?!! in the next room, who (Apparantly) were happy to be together at 03:00hrs in the morning,,OH YES OH YES OH YES YES YES!
I would have gladly thrown a bucket of cold water over them.
Sadly Dick Turpin only sold cold water from his vending machines by the bottle!
Happy Holidays!
DICK TURPIN OWNS THE VENDING MACHINES! 
