Telemachos Hotel, Corfu

...for a livelier holiday. I would not recommend Telemachos under any circumstances; it was neither a good value hotel nor a nice environment. I personally would never go anywhere with Olympus again!!!

thank you for reading about my worse holiday ever!

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In June 2004 I broke up with my partner of 5 years. It was a strained relationship at best and by the end of it I really needed a holiday. My mum was already planning to go away so I jumped on the band wagon as it were and we started looking.

We found a holiday on teletext leaving 3 days later to Corfu, a Greek island. It cost £360 per person through Mytravel to stay all inclusive at a 2* hotel called Telemachos. Our tour operator was Olympus. I decided to take my eldest son as he had a passport and the breakdown of my relationship and arguments leading up to it had left him feeling insecure and a little unloved and neglected.

The holiday was a disaster from the onset…

We flew from Gatwick. Our flight was at 7:40am due to arrive at 1:05 but we endured a 5 hour delay because a component was needed for the engine which had to be brought from Manchester. The staff at Gatwick were really nice, helpful and sympathetic and all passengers received a £5 voucher for refreshments. Once finally on the plane it was discovered that due to the delay the plane hadn't been supplied with enough food so we all got 2 free drinks of our choice to compensate, by which time I needed a stiff drink and had a couple of Jack Daniels. The in flight television did work (thank the lord for small mercies) and we watched school of rock. The flight seemed relatively quick as was the coach transfer and we got to our hotel at about 6:30pm. By which time we were starving.

On the coach transfer it was apparent that our hotel was situated at the top of a very steep hill, but the surroundings were lush and green so I didn't mind that too much.

First impressions of the hotel were quite positive, it was clean, quite small and freshly decorated and appeared comfortable, our room which was a twin room was quite spacious and comprised of 2 single beds, a large wardrobe, dressing table and 2 sets of drawers. The bathroom had a shower and a hairdryer but no bath. Unfortunately our balcony overlooked the car park. The room was cleaned daily and the bed linen changed twice. Air con was an optional extra costing 40 euros.

I found the staff miserable, unfriendly and unhelpful. The entertainment was dire, there was a quiz, a karaoke, a female vocalist, a BBQ and the highlight of the entertainment was a Greek night with traditional dancers which was actually pretty good.

The all inclusive guests were treated like 2nd class citizens, we could only get food and drinks from a small hut in a well hidden, shaded area over the far side of the pool, the food available to us was pizza slice, ice cream, hot dog or cheese on toast and the small selection of local drinks we were allowed were served in plastic cups and only until 9:30pm which is when the entertainment starts, stockpiling drinks was also frowned upon. We were not allowed to use our all inclusive privileges in the inside bar or the poolside bar. The pool side bar did however have a extensive menu of snacks and drinks to buy and also some really nice cocktails for about 4 euros each (my favourites being bloody mary and sex on the beach).
The food available at lunch and dinner was un-varied and un-appetising with stale bread and one desert each night, I stuck to soup for the most part accompanied by warm bitter tasting wine or tepid tap water.

I did complain to our rep as did every other all inclusive guest but she was rude and unhelpful.

On an upside the pool was lovely and there was a separate shallow pool for children which was the only child friendly aspect to the hotel.

The town of Dassia was basic but Ok, there are plenty of tavernas /restaurants/supermarkets and gift shops. The local tavernas /restaurants were reasonably priced for food about 4 euros for a full English breakfast or 2 euros for a toasted sandwich with salad though drinks were quite expensive everywhere, about 9 euros for 2 drinks.

The walk to the beach was about 15-20 minutes which on a hot day is extremely tiring and then you have to walk up the hill back to the hotel. It's worth a visit to the beach if just to sunbathe though it's a pebble beach not a sandy one. Lots of water sports are on offer but I found them to be over priced. I took my son out on a pedalo which was 12 euros for 1 hour.

We went on a boat trip around the north of the island which was a lovely day out, we swam through caves and snorkelled in a lagoon, Drinks and food was included in the trip and we stopped in a few ports to shop for souvenirs. This was the best part of our holiday and it cost 35 Euros each.

I went on a night out in Ipsos with some girls I'd met at the hotel and a Greek waiter called Petros who I was having a holiday fling with and some of his friends, we went to a foam party which is one of my favourite nights out when I go abroad. Our rep was also at the club which I (stupidly) found reassuring. As it happened the girls I was with ended up worse for wares and one of them passed out in the toilet, I went to find our rep in hope that she could alert someone or help the girl to get home as we had been driven to the club and weren't sure where we were. I found the rep pole dancing with her bottom hanging out of her trousers and her boobs hanging out of her top, she was so drunk that she was unable to communicate properly let alone help, when I told her she was a disgrace she fell into Petros' arms crying that his date (me) was a mean b**ch etc, then she proceeded to snog my date! Soon after I started to feel peculiar and was able to identify the feelings as being the affects of drugs (thank you miss-spent youth), Our drinks had been spiked, lucky for me I hadn't been drinking as heavily as the other girls and as the most capable of us all I ran for a taxi and returned to the club in it to pick up the others. When I got back to the club the rep was physically attacking one of my friends and was trying to get some local men involved, we escaped in the taxi but I still can't believe the conduct of the Olympus rep!

Over the moon to be going home we packed our stuff up the night before only to realise that our tickets were gone! I frantically searched the room to no avail and spent the whole next morning phoning Olympus and explaining my predicament, the hotel rep refused to help at all and implied that I had it coming, I eventually managed to arrange replacement tickets at the airport for 30 euros. We left Corfu at 14:05 and arrived home at 15:15 how's that for time travel!

I would recommend Dassia to people looking for a quite, relaxing break though I would recommend going b+b or self catering as the food can be naff. Otherwise go to Ipsos for a livelier holiday. I would not recommend Telemachos under any circumstances; it was neither a good value hotel nor a nice environment. I personally would never go anywhere with Olympus again!!!

thank you for reading about my worse holiday ever!

 

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