Choachí is the sort of small town just outside Bogotá that wouldn’t normally come up on your radar. However, it does have one attractions, as it’s home to the Termales Santa Moncica, and when we had yet another ‘Puente’ (long weekend) we decided an excursion was in order.
Public transport in Colombia is always an ‘experience’ and this trip was no exception. Busses don’t leave from the main Terminal de Transportes, but from a smaller hut which masquerades as a bus station in the south west of the city. It is on Calle 6, just after the junction with Carerra 15 and though not the nicest part of town, it’s ok during the day. If you’re walking, the recommendation is, rather unusually, to walk through the nearby park rather than walk along the street.
When we arrived, there were a few busses waiting, but you have to get your ticket before boarding – a first for me in Colombia. It costs $7500 each way (about £2.50) which is quite a lot for such a short trip (within the city limits, a trip of the same length of time would cost $1400 or under 50p). Tickets are for specific buses, so you need to ask which one you’re down for. We were the last 3 on, so it set off quickly, winding out of the city and up into the mountains.
The journey is bumpy, winding and slightly nauseating but the view is stunning. The buses drop you on the edge of town, and you then need to find transport to the Termales. The options are a boring regular bus ($1500 each) or a fun, colourful golf cart. We went for the latter and paid $7000 for the 3 of us but it was entertaining and worth it in my mind as we got a little guided tour of the town including commentary on the procession that blocked out way for a few minutes since we happened to be visiting on a special local festival day.The Termales have a hotel attached, but are open to the public too. Entrance on Sundays or holidays is $25000 per adult, $17000 per child (aged 2 – 12) so
it’s really not cheap by local standards, but for most visitors is not the sort of thing you would do every week even if you lived close. We paid and got little tickets which we immediately had to hand over (no souvenirs for scrapbooks). In exchange, they searched our bags (I thought it might be for food...but they let my bottle of water pass) and handed out swimming caps. First stop was the changing rooms which are unisex but include lots of individual cubicles as well as open areas. They have a bag check facility which costs 500 pesos (about 17p) every time you use it – so if you return to get out a book or retrieve your purse, you have to pay again. The good thing is, the price is per massive bin bag, so we stuck all our stuff in together and only had to pay once. We had to leave a name AND an ID number which seemed over the top, and in exchange
we got a locker tag which would have been a lot more usable had it not been on a basic rubber band. It fit round my wrist or ankle, but seemed nowhere near as strong as a normal swimming pool band.
The complex has a number of pools in two main areas.
The first one you see as you enter is a medium temperature one, and looks like a regular lap pool, long and rectangular. Around it there are a few sun loungers and lots of plastic chairs. This was always the least crowded during our stay, and had plenty of space to spread out both in and out of the water.
The other section is
down a beautifully manicured path and consists of various smaller pools, plus more changing rooms and massage cubicles. We started off here, dumping out towels on one of the rocks at the edge. There are a further two large, long pools,
one freezing cold and one a much nicer temperature. There are also 3 smaller pools which are much hotter – the website claims
the top water temperature is 40 degrees which seems obscene. We slapped on our caps which are not that horrible, hair wrenching Lycra but instead made of a thin papery fabric, like surgical masks. They are stamped with the name of the Termales, and easy enough to fit over big ponytails or buns, even if they were far from flattering. As you might expect, people tended to cling to the sides of the pools rather than swim, but
even the deep end of the biggest pool wasn’t too deep, and although the water didn’t seem that salty, it also had more buoyancy than normal pools so it was easy to float. The water in the first pool was
like a nice warm bath, just without the bubbles and with the addition of a few leaves and dead flies – though, thanks to the caps, a refreshing lack of other people’s hair.
When we had had enough of here, we moved on to the smaller pools. One is a bit like a Jacuzzi, with timed bubble jets. It was boiling hot and my feet really didn’t like it though the rest of me quickly acclimatised. This was a very popular pool despite its potent, sulphur smell. This is the only pool with warning signs, advising you of a maximum stay of 20 mins before swapping it for a cooler pool or cold shower. There is a beautiful shower area which feels and looks like a natural cave just to one side of here. The water is icy cold and comes out of thin, hosepipe style nozzles, but is great for shocking your system straight after a quick dip.
Next stop were the two other pools which lie side by side (you can easily hop over the low wall from one to another). They have bench style seats round the edge so you can sit back and relax rather than having to stand or float, and are slightly cooler than that super hot pool but still far warmer than a normal pool. These were also popular pools and, well, let’s just say
some Colombians have a different sense of personal space requirements. No matter how much I fidgeted, I always seemed to end up touching a sprawling, hairy leg. Being with two blondes didn’t really help – even with the caps it was clear that they weren’t the usual bathers and as such attracted glances, comments and other attention.
After trying all the pools on principle, we went for lunch. There are a few options around both pool areas, but the menu is the same throughout. I had looked at it online in advance and was excited by the prospect of vegetable lasagne.
The others ordered more traditional fish and meat/bean/rice dishes. The prices seemed ok considering they had a captive audience, but we were confused by the fact that we had to pay in advance despite it being waiter service. Still, we handed over the cash only to be told 10 minutes later that there was no lasagna to be had. Since there was nothing else assuredly vegetarian on the menu
, I decided to skip a hot dish. All the money was returned, and the bill recalculated, but whether deliberately or as a result of the panic brought on by serving 3 glaring Gringas, the total was wrong and had we not been vigilant, we would have overpaid. With no receipt or bill on offer, no doubt this would simply have been pocketed. While the girls waited for their food to arrive, I went to the snack bar. It was quite well stocked in traditional Colombian style, which means beer, chocolate and yogurts, the same as every corner shop near me. They do fab cereal yogurts here (cereal comes in a separate pouch to mix in, a bit like a Muller Corner) so I got one of those and again, the price was certainly reasonable, the same as a big supermarket.We sat in the
open air, pool side restaurant and though the tables and chairs were cheap, and the decor uninspiring, it was a nice setting and offered much needed shelter from the sun. Afterwards we decided ice creams were needed, and got fun, semi-home made things on sticks, deciding that these looked a little more appetizing than the pre-scooped balls also on offer.
The ice cream prices came as a shock, mainly because lunch had been reasonable, but it was a day out and blissfully sunny, so we forked out the money needed (about the same as a 99 on Blackpool seafront).
I may have mentioned the weather once or twice – and yes, partly it’s because I’m British and like to talk about it, but it’s also because the weather in Bogota is awful most of the time, so we were thrilled not only by the lack of rain, but also by the absence of clouds after lunch. Out came the sun cream, the hats, the reading material, and we laid back to bask in it. By the large first pool it was nice and relaxed, quite peaceful and perfect for a bit of chilling out. Clearly the running, screaming children preferred the warmer waters of the other section.
When I’d read (or rather re-read, for the 10th time) a magazine, we went for a wander, ending up in the steam room over in the other section. I have been in these before, but never one quite like this. It was completely impossible to see anything (I kept imagining I’d sit on someone á la Chandler in Friends) and the air was so thick it was hard to breathe. After making a token effort to show the little white girls were as hard as the locals, we scuttled out and into the nearby showers which had more power than the outside cave ones, and cooled us right down.
Soon it was time to go, as we had to get back to Choachí centre, onto a bus over the mountains, and then back to our homes. We did one final lap of the pools and by this point had become far more relaxed about our belongings, flinging them all on a rock (cameras, wallets and all) rather than returning them to the locker lady.
Everyone seemed to be doing the same and while I wouldn’t have wanted to leave stuff and go wandering off, with it mainly within sight we felt fine.
When it comes to clothing, anything goes here. They are not a fussy complex with ridiculous rules and we saw people wearing shorts and t-shirts in the water as well as others in bikinis and costumes. I think it’s wrong when pools in hot countries have bans on things like t-shirts, especially where children are concerned, as it’s so easy to burn and the best defence is to cover up. Most people brought flipflops to wear up to the water’s edge as the ground was stony in places. Although you are supposed to wear the caps, a few people took them off to use in lieu of a ball for impromptu games of Piggy in the Middle and nothing was said.
They don’t have lifeguards,
but there are signs up regarding the supervision of children (and the prohibiting of those under a certain age from the hottest pools). There was one woman who seemed to work there but who gave up by mid afternoon and lay out on a lounger near us in her rather fetching get up of completely see through black chiffon flares and a dubious black thong bikini. There were lots of other staff around, but these all worked in the various food places.This is the third time I have been to thermal baths in this area, following Christmas Eve at some in Costa Rica, and a Carnival trip to Ecuador last year. The thing that struck me about Santa Monica was that it was much more ordinary than the others – although the setting was reasonably pretty, it wasn’t outstandingly beautiful (like Costa Rica) or wonderfully atmospheric (like in Baños). Half of the pools were regular shaped ones that just happened to be warmer than your local baths, and the other 3 were small and quite Jacuzzi like. While some had nice landscaping, one looked over a carpark through a metal fence and others looked straight into the open doors of the changing rooms which damaged the ambience somewhat. I would have liked to have seen more fountains or waterfalls or other features in keeping with the theme of the place, and though
the gardens were pretty with exotic plants and flowers, these weren’t really visible from the pools.
Not having any on-going health complaints I cannot comment on the effectiveness of the healing powers of the water, and from what I could tell local families just treated this as a day out the way we used to spend winter weekends at Blackpool Sandcastle. Even the website is a bit cagey, saying _As a result of their physical and/or chemical characteristics, they MAY exert therapeutical effects which relieve or restore people's health. These waters have energetic factors such as the powerful ionization, mineralization, radioactivity, gases and PH variations._ Which, let’s be honest, all sounds a bit baloney to me.
That’s not to say I didn’t enjoy the day, as
I had a great time, but I have seen better, especially for the price. I was also a little shaken up after the rough journey there, which meant my first half hour or so in the water was really about trying to stop feeling sick, and to regain my appetite.
Before you label me a complete wuss, come over here and try out the local public transport on the local roads...
I had previously contemplated staying at the on-site hotel, but it was for Easter and we made other arrangements. It looks like a nice, if slightly dated place, and comes complete with sports pitches and recreation areas, plus a couple of residents only pools which we could not access. Happily, most of the areas are included in your day-visitor entrance fee, so we didn’t feel cheated in that respect.
Termales Santa Monica boasts a decent website that also has an English version, found here:
http://www.termalessantamonica.com/en/hotsprings.htm
The complex is open from 9am to 6pm during the week, and 8am to 6pm at the weekends and on holidays.
Entrance is $25,000 adults / $17,000 children on Sundays and holidays and $20,000 adults / $13,000 children the rest of the time. There is no discounted entry for the afternoon or towards closing time.
Presently £1 is about $3000 (they use $ but the currency is Colombian Pesos)
Feeling Hot, Hot, Hot! 
