All inclusive cruising on the high seas, a tour of the Canary Islands, and a chance to experience the Topaz before she retires from Thomson’s after years of loyal service, how could I resist.
I used to imagine
cruises were for older, elitist
couples, but friends and family persuaded me otherwise. The Topaz offers all inclusive cruises, drinks included, and on the recommendation of others we decided to try her before she is replaced this year by Thomson’s new ship, The Spirit.
With seven decks to explore, entertainment and 24 hour dining, it sounded too good to be true, especially as the prices were excellent. We booked last July from the teletext, using a company called Book and Go. Total cost including insurance and flight supplements from Manchester was £890 for two adults. I was stunned at this low price bearing in mind this was not a late deal, booked for January the 17th this gave 6 months notice.
Disaster hit however when Book and Go ceased trading last November. Although we had paid the balance to them, they had not paid Thomson’s, in fact we only found out they had ceased trading when 3 weeks before the holiday we phoned them to enquire where our tickets were. Panic stations were manned and the holiday looked like it might not happen, but luckily Thomson’s very professionally stepped in to rescue us. As an ATOL protected company we only had to prove we had paid for the holiday and they were happy to honour the agreement and claim the
money back on our behalf, thank goodness for ATOL.
Flights ~ The 4 ½ hour flight to Tenerife left on time and an in-flight meal was provided. Apparently in the near future this meal will cost £10, I personally wouldn’t purchase it as I find the meals are usually not of a high standard but this is personal choice. The Britannia plane was clean with pleasant enough staff and in-flight entertainment. Headphones were provided free although on some flights I have known them have to be paid for. Duty-free was available and although perfumes were the same price as in the shops and on all the islands we visited cigarettes were cheaper on the flight than anywhere else.
Arrival and Transfers ~ The Thomson rep was easy to spot at arrivals and we were directed to a comfortable and newish looking coach. The transfer took about 1 hour to the port. Once there a member of the ship came on board and clear instructions were given for embarkation. A large
tent type area was set up on the port and here we collected an envelope that contained various information including stickers bearing our cabin numbers. We placed these on our cases and they were then left with the
cruise staff that would deliver them to our room. We were told this could take up to two hours but ours arrived within 30 minutes. We were greeted and welcomed onto the ship and once onboard went through the process of handing over our passports and
collecting room keys etc. This was fast and smooth with the minimum of fuss. From there a member of staff showed us to our room and the cruise began.
The Room ~ Small but clean. The Topaz was built in the 1950s and although she has undergone several refurbishments the lady does show some signs of age. It wasn’t the best room I had ever stayed in but was adequate. Our room was on the lower Bolero deck (or steerage as we affectionately referred to it) and although I have a terrible sense of direction, everything is well signposted and easy to find. The room contained a double bed with plenty of room underneath to store the cases, 4 large drawers in a dressing table and two very adequate wardrobes with storage space above. All rooms have air-conditioning that can be turned off if desired and the bedding was clean. The bed was a little uncomfortable due to having a rubber sheet on the mattress but I felt this was preferable to lying on any bodily secretions that previous occupants may have left.
The bathroom was compact but adequate although having a shower meant flooding the whole floor as there was nothing to keep the water in the shower area. Luckily enough towels were provided for mopping up and they were changed twice a day.
Housekeeping ~ I cannot speak highly enough of the lady that cleaned our room. Unlike hotel rooms that have may have daily room service, the Topaz rooms are cleaned. The beds are made up in the morning and then turned back for you at night. The first night was a bit of a shock as we tried to climb under the 2 single duvets that were provided, we found they had been folded in a very unusual way that I can only describe as resembling sleeping or body bags, unusual to say the least. As well as cleaning the maid folded any clothing that we left out and her attention to detail was brilliant. One night I left my nightdress on the bed and she made a flower shape out of it.
Payment ~ No money changes hands on the ship at all except in the casino for obvious reasons. Guests are given a card with their name on and this is presented if any purchases are made i.e. duty free or booking excursions. There is actually very little to spend money on, there are shops providing clothes, jewellery and even
crystal but I chose to spend my money onshore. These
cards must also be shown whenever you have left the ship and try to renter it for security reasons and to prevent stowaways.
Bars and Lounges ~ There are 5 of these on board, each one has a different atmosphere or theme i.e. the Windjammer Lounge which provided a comfortable retreat, The Sports Bar & Disco which held more upbeat entertainment and so on. Soft drinks, lager, some wines and spirits were all free between the hours of 10.00 and 02.00; there was a charge for water. The spirits were not brand names but I personally couldn’t tell any difference in the alternatives they provided such as Malibu, Vodka, Gin, Baileys and Brandy etc. Certain cocktails were free but I did notice some people buying brand named drinks and particular cocktails, why anyone would want to I can’t understand but I suppose this is personal choice. The bars are comfortable with smoking and non-smoking areas and the staff are excellent.
Guests never wait long for a waiter to serve them and we found they even brought the next round without being asked. 99% of the staff I met worked very long hours but were pleasant and friendly. They all wore uniforms and were neat and smart.
Eating Places ~
Le Cabaret Restaurant ~ every guest is invited here for one show entitled around the world; the show includes a meal which was excellent. The show itself is entertaining but more than that the meal and drinks are served to music with precision timing that is amazing. The attention to detail was second to none i.e. the sweet was served on a plate that resembled an artists palate, this even had 3 little heart shapes on it that at first appeared to be part of the plates design but on closer inspection were individually iced trimmings. This is definitely an evening to enjoy and a sight to see.
The Topaz
Dining Room ~ Very formal and hosted by the ships officers. Meals are open sitting but guests are seated by the staff and you have no choice about where or who you sit with. I personally preferred to choose my own table and companions so this formality didn’t suit me but again it’s personal choice. This room is also used for the Captains Cocktail Party and all guests are invited to this during the cruise. This is definitely a night to go to town with ball gowns and Tiaras aplenty although this was intermixed with other women in smart party type dresses. The men wore either the typical penguin type suits that looked very smart or alternatively a smart suit. I used this opportunity to wear a ball gown as it’s not something I’d usually wear and hubby wore his suit. This is also an opportunity to have a
photograph taken in your finery by the ships photographer who uses professional backgrounds and helps you to position you. At £12 these photographs are excellent value compared to what you would pay for a sitting at home.
The meal during the show was excellent quality and despite being seated with strangers we were soon chatting and struck up a
friendship that lasted throughout the holiday.
The Yatch Club ~ my favourite place to eat. This room is less formal and guests choose their own seating arrangements and food is buffet style with drinks served by the waiters. Its a large airy room on the upper deck and has views of wherever the ship may be at the time. It was lovely to sit by the window and watch the sunrise or fall and there was an outside eating area for those nice sunny days. This place offered 24 hour dining and was always well stocked with a variety of choices. It’s probably better to eat outside of meal times to avoid queues and we found 12.30 to be a particularly busy time. We found it better to wait until later when the room was less busy. The choice was enormous. Breakfasts consisted cold meats and cheeses, cereals, fruit, toast or a full English if desired.
Lunch and evening meals had the usual soup, salads, chips, rice, jacket potatoes and then 4 or 5 main course choices. Cakes, fruit/salad, hot puddings or ice cream followed this.
The food was attractively served and was always piping hot.
It was reassuring to see the staff checking food temperature regularly and hygiene standards seemed high.
Late afternoon sandwiches and cakes are available for a light snack.
Entertainment ~ Excellent, the dancers are very professional as were the vocalists. Even the crews talent show was good with one waitress having a voice that matched Tina Turners and another crew member singing Delilah with a Phillapino accent that had the audience rocking and singing along. Another good evening was ‘The Weakest Link’ with the compare Gladys, a fierce but funny dame in the style of Mrs Doubtfire, absolutely hilarious, insulting but inoffensive.
There was a show every night, which ranged from musical type themes to something for the golden oldies. Alongside this in other areas were discos, karaoke or pub quizzes or a nice live band playing easy listening type music, obviously something for everyone. During the daytime various activities such as line dancing, old-time dancing, quizzes and aerobics were available. All the entertainment is listed in ‘cruise news’ that is delivered to your cabin every day so you know what is happening.
Excursions ~ were varied and plentiful and varied from approximately £28 - £60 depending on the length of time and the activities. One of the dearest included a helicopter trip of
Madeira but I didn’t try this. Overall the excursions didn’t appear good value for money and in most ports we made our own way around for a fraction of the cost. In Madera for example we had a pleasant walk to the cable
cars, which took about 20 minutes and then travelled on the
cable car for a total cost of £18 return for us both. This excursion cost approx £28 with Thomson’s.
The only excursion we took was in Morocco as we had heard many unsavoury stories of taxi drivers being untrustworthy and demanding lots of money. At approx £50 to see the Kasbah, some horse riders and dancers and then a 40 minute visit to a market it wasn’t good value but you actually pay for the safety aspect of things. Even so we found Morocco to be an unpleasant experience with many of the elderly couples and women intimidated by locals demanding money. I felt safe because my hubby was with me but two old ladies tagged along with us because they had felt frightened and intimidated by some of the men hassling them.
Other Facilities ~
Medical Centre ~ is staffed 24hours a day and has an English speaking doctor. I didn’t need to use the doctor thank goodness but I noticed a consultation was around £30, I imagine treatment would be on top of this fee.
Reception ~ Located in the information
square it had English speaking staff who were very helpful. I had the usually women’s nightmare of unexpectedly needing sanitary protection in the middle of the night and one call to reception solved the problem by directing me to the medical centre. Once there I was met by a nurse and discreetly sold the necessary items. Just one tip, as I had English money I was able to pay for them.
If I hadn’t had any cash and they were charged to my account the nurse told me she would have to charge me the £30 consultation fee. Now call me tight if you want but that would be the dearest box of tampax ever, and lets be honest, I don’t need a £30 consultation with another woman to recognise and know
how to treat a period.
Reception follow up any queries with a letter enquiring if your problem has been resolved adequately, I felt this was a very professional touch.
Beauty Salon ~ open daily but booking required.
Casino ~ Roulette, blackjack and
slot machines. Hubby and I bought £10 of chips (I know, big spenders that we are) and had a go at
Pontoon as I call it. At the start of the evening £1 bets are allowed and we played for about 3 hours until we eventually lost of course, again the staff were pleasant and didn’t mind amateurs like myself. Later in the evening the stakes were higher with £2 the minimum bid and some people played for huge amounts with £5 chips, time to move on.
Fitness Centre ~ Not my cup of tea but hubby tried it and said it was clean and adequate.
Currency Exchange ~ Most places took Euros, Morocco had its own currency and we had been unprepared for that. Fortunately they still take euros or English pounds and as the country has a closed currency we didn’t buy any because any you have left over you are unable to change back anywhere else.
Ironing Room ~ for guests use if needed and a laundry service is provided at a cost.
Ports Of Call ~ this particular cruise included
Tenerife
La Palma
Madera
Morocco
Lanzarote
Gran Canaria
Some of our fellow travellers complained that the ship docked in ports which were out of the way of tourist areas and involved a lot of walking or taking taxis. As we are relatively fit we didn’t mind walking 2-3 miles into town although I can see it being a problem for less mobile travellers. Using a taxi was actually quite reasonable in price but a good tip is to leave the port ignoring the taxis that are waiting at the ship, these always charge a higher price into town. Once outside the port taxis are usually plentiful but do negotiate a price before you get into the taxi. We found we could even haggle with the taxi drivers and they would drop their price.
Overall ~ the holiday was excellent value for money with
good food and entertainment. The staff are second to none and the atmosphere is friendly and bubbly. Despite free drinks I only saw two people the worst for drink and the majority were sensible but paced themselves. Our on ship bill which included one excursion, 2 bottles of
perfume a photograph and a few toiletries came to £129.
Apart from our own onshore spending i.e. taxis, a couple of drinks and entry to the cable cars and gifts for the family, I have never spent so little on holiday and had such a good time.
Negative parts of the holiday ~ As I mentioned the room did show signs of the ships age, but I actually could forgive this as everything else made up for it and I knew beforehand how old she was.
The other areas of the ship still look beautiful and maintenance was continuing even as we were there.
The biggest negative for me was Morocco which everyone we spoke to felt the tour guides should warn guests about and I personally hated this port of call. On future visits I would stay aboard ship or even take one of the excursions out to surrounding areas, which people seemed to enjoy more.
Thomson’s certainly had a winning combination with the Topaz and many people return to the ship time and time again. Although the new ship is full board, drinks will be extra and this will obviously increase the overall holiday bill. I would have travelled again on this ship if it were remaining in service, at the price we paid it was fantastic value for money, I am definitely cruisified and converted now.