I love monkeys. A lot. So when figuring out what to do on one of my visits to my uni roommate we decided to check out the Trentham Monkey Forest. I had found out about it by reading a Dooyoo review and the fact that it was about an hour's drive from her home in Derby, and there were other things to do there such as an outlet and scenic walks, made it the ideal location for us to pass a pleasant day.

Sadly, things didn't end up quite so rosy. First let me explain a little about the Monkey Forest. It is set in the Trentham Estate in Stoke-on-Trent, which as I mentioned is also home to various other attractions such as a retail village, beautiful gardens, an aerial assault course and woodland walks.

You enter the Monkey Forest through a separate gate to the rest of the estate, and once through the "monkey-proof gates" get up close and personal with around 140 Barbary apes, who live in the 60 acre park. If you actually consider how big 60 acres is, it doesn't seem like much once you're inside because you do have to follow the paths and a lot of that is out-of-sight woodland.

There are also regular talks by "knowledgeable staff", boards with information along the route of the path and feeding times you can watch. We sat down to listen to one of the talks (and a monkey sat next to me which made my DAY until a guy with a camera chased it away!) and weren't all that impressed. The "knowledgeable staff member" was simply reading information we had already learned from the boards and when asked questions kind of fluffed over his answers with pretty obvious common-sense things that Joe Public would probably come up with if put on the spot. I will say, though, that from the staff who were dotted around walking the paths to answer questions, they do seem to know the individual monkeys if nothing else.

We finished the walk around the park pretty quickly and although there's nothing to stop you going around as many times as you want, we were hungry for our picnic at this point, which obviously we were not allowed to bring inside. We had got close to the monkeys, and I got some nice pictures. It was a novelty at first but except for those swinging in the trees in the more wooded area the path intersected, they were mostly eating potatoes or sleeping. Sometimes a fight broke out, which was fun to watch, but I do think that no matter how much of a "natural habitat" they are trying to create, a few toys or things to stimulate the monkeys and make them more interesting to watch would be nice. Because let's face it, in their natural habitat these monkeys are not going to have to share their home with tourists pointing cameras in their faces.

Before we left, we stopped in the gift shop and purchased some souvenirs to commemorate our day (which had not yet soured). These were reasonably priced and there was a lot of monkey paraphernalia to choose from.

After retrieving our picnic from the car, we headed back towards the turnstile, tickets in hand, to go ahead to the picnic area, which along with toilets, the gift shop and a play area is before the gate to the "monkey-proofed" section of the park.

When we showed our tickets to the girl on the desk, she informed us we couldn't re-enter as we didn't have a wristband. We pointed out we did have both tickets and card receipts, and even ID to prove these were our cards, used today, but she wasn't having any of it. When we inquired about this wristband, she claimed there was a sign before the exit gate warning us we needed one. So maybe there was (we didn't get far enough again to find out), but we stopped at the gate to pick up leaflets and neither of us noticed, so it can't have been that well-placed, us both being able to read and all! We told her we had bought our tickets from the girl at the opposite desk, some 10 feet away, who told us she had never seen us before. Perhaps because she was sullen and never looked up at the point of sale! I was, I should point out, wearing a bright red hoody and yes I realise they may see a lot of people in a day, but we were pretty conspicuous. I was even clutching my cup I had just bought inside, which they claimed we could have "brought from home", as well as, I'm told, "swapping our ticket in the car park with someone else". And then, I assume, trading identities and credit cards and IDs as well.

Needless to say we were very annoyed by this, as we had been planning to re-enter the monkey portion after our picnic, and ended up eating on the grass verge of the car park fuming about the stupidity of the desk staff. In our outrage, we decided to boycott he rest of the estate and head back to Derby. It had cost us £6 each to get in (£4.50 for kids, £5.50 for OAPs/students) so had we been a whole family who had been turned away, we would have blown a lot of money, especially if we had wanted our picnic before seeing the monkeys, as we would have essentially paid that much to use a picnic table!

Once home I fired off an email to the park, stating our disappointment and suggesting they maybe stamp everyone's hand or point out at the sales desk that you need a wristband. My complaints letters are EXCELLENT, and usually have people grovelling and sending me freebies, etc. I certainly haven't lost my touch, several people said it was a good letter, although the line about "not realising they let monkeys work there too" could have been a bit excessive. However, all I got was a particularly rude response stating the desk staff were right. What about the customer always being right too? What about thanking me for my quite frankly much more sensible suggestion? I realise perhaps there was a sign which I missed, but there was no need for rudeness either at the park or in correspondence, and we had plenty of proof we'd been in and paid!

So, if you do go to Monkey Forest, know that it's pretty small, a little expensive, and you definitely need a wristband.